Greek Fire, Poison Arrows, and Scorpion Bombs: Unconventional Warfare in the Ancient World by Adrienne Mayor

Mayor has picked a fascinating topic for her book, Greek Fire, Poison Arrows, and Scorpion Bombs: Unconventional Warfare in the Ancient World. It examines the strange but rich history of unconventional warfare in ancient history, including poisoned arrows, honey made by bees eating from hallucinogenic (and poisonous) flowers, greek fire, and more.

Mayor has done deep research, and it holds up. The writing felt a little patchy at points – at times the book felt more like a laundry list than a deep narrative. But if you’re interested in the history, this is a deep piece on a rarely covered topic – well worth it if that’s what you’re after.

Quotes

Preface

Page 11

the intention to send carriers of disease into enemy territory is recorded on cuneiform tablets from Mesopotamia; Assyrian reliefs illustrate the use of naphtha firepots; ancient arrowheads tipped with crystallized venom in museum collections were found to be viable; and archaeologists have now discovered remnants of chemical fireballs hurled at Alexander the Great’s army in Pakistan and medieval naphtha grenades in Egypt.

Page 12

Sasanian attackers deliberately created a deadly sulfur dioxide gas to suffocate Romans in a tunnel, in AD 256. The skeletons of twenty victims and residue of sulfur crystals and pitch burned in braziers seem to confirm the hypothesis.

1. Heracles and the Hydra: The Invention of Biological Weapons

Page 74

Odysseus had once come here to consult the pallid, embittered ghosts of the Underworld. Three centuries after Homer, in the fifth century BC, the ancient Greek historian Herodotus described a renowned necromanteon, an Oracle of the Dead, at Ephyra. Archaeologists have discovered the substantial ruins of an underground labyrinth, whose features match Homer’s description of the Halls of Hades in the Odyssey. Scholars believe that local hallucinogenic plants were used in the ancient rites of the Oracle of the Dead at Ephyra.

Page 78

In 1943, for instance, in the worst Allied seaport disaster since Pearl Harbor, thousands of American soldiers and Italian townspeople in Bari, Italy, were killed by exposure to poison gas when a US ship secretly carrying two thousand chemical bombs was shelled in the harbor by German aircraft. A more recent example is the cluster of health problems suffered by US troops who destroyed Iraq’s biochemical munitions in the Gulf War of 1991. In 2003 it transpired that many of the biological agents used to create those weapons had come from the United States during the 1980s.

3. Poison Waters, Deadly Vapors

Page 130

In an ancient forerunner to the 1924 Geneva Convention (in response to the bioterror of gassing in World War I), after the battle of Kirrha the defenders of the sacred site of Delphi agreed that poisoning water was unacceptable in a religious war, and among the allies of Delphi should they ever find themselves at war with one another. According to the Amphictionic League’s new rule of war, articulated by the Athenian orator Aeschines, contaminating drinking water was to be forbidden in conflicts of a special, sacred, nature.

Page 133

According to Frontinus, Semiramis conquered Babylon with a brilliant water trick. The Euphrates River flowed through the city, dividing it in two. Semiramis, who undertook many waterworks projects during her reign, had her engineers divert the river, so that her army could march right into the city in the dry riverbed.

4. A Casket of Plague in the Temple of Babylon

Page 179

In India, where all manner of toxic substances could be had, poisoning was a favored method of political assassination in myth and history. One of the most ingenious methods described in Sanskrit literature was to send an irresistible gift in the form of a so- called Poison Maiden (Visha Kanya). In the Katha Sarit Sagara, a collection of Indian lore compiled by the poet Somadeva (about AD 1050), King Brahmadatta “sent poison damsels as dancing- girls among the enemy’s host.” In an ancient twist on the modern idea of “sleepers”— undetected, lurking assassins or terrorists who await orders to kill— Poison Maidens were carefully “prepared” and dispatched as secret weapons. A touch, a kiss, or sexual intercourse with one of these ravishing but deadly damsels brought sure death.

Page 181

The Spanish not only poisoned French wine with contaminated blood, but, according to the medical writer Gabriele Falloppia, they also “intentionally chased beautiful, infectious prostitutes into the French army camp.”

5. Sweet Sabotage

Page 202

in the 1980s South African government agents poisoned beer, whiskey, cigarettes, chocolates, sugar, and peppermints to murder antiapartheid dissidents.

Page 207

Then, in 1965– 67, during experiments with LSD- like agents, the Pentagon secretly released on US citizens in Hawaii a hallucinogen that was being developed as a chemical weapon.

6. Animal Allies

Page 215

Bees’- nest bombs were probably among the first projectile weapons, and the scholar of Mesopotamian history Edward Neufeld surmises that hornets’ nests were lobbed at enemies hiding in caves as early as Neolithic times (fig. 22). Bees have figured in warfare in different cultures of many eras. The sacred text of the Maya in Central America, the Popol Vuh, for example, describes an ingenious bee booby trap used to repel besiegers: dummy warriors outfitted in cloaks, spears, and shields were posted along the walls of the citadel. War bonnets were placed on the heads, which were actually large gourds filled with bees, wasps, and flies. As the assailants scaled the walls, the gourds were smashed. The furious insects homed in on the warriors, who were soon “dazed by the yellow jackets and wasps [and were sent] stumbling and falling down the mountainside.”

Page 219

Another method was to set up hives with trip wires along the enemy’s route, a method used by both sides in Europe in World War I.

Page 222

Holed up inside their fortified city, King Barsamia and the citizens of Hatra prepared strong defense plans as the Roman legions advanced over the desert. One of their defenses was biological. Anticipating by seventeen hundred years the bombs of fragile porcelain filled with noxious insects that the Japanese dropped on China in World War II, the Hatreni filled clay- pot bombs with live “poisonous insects” and sealed them up, ready to hurl down at the attackers.

Page 232

This time, the Egyptian defense was very well- organized, holding off the Persians with batteries of artillery that shot stones, bolts, and fire. Cambyses responded by placing a unique zoological shield before his ranks: a phalanx of yowling cats, bleating sheep, barking dogs, and mute ibexes. All these animals were worshipped by the Egyptians, and just as Cambyses hoped, the warriors halted their fire to avoid harming any sacred creatures. Pelusium fell and the Persians conquered Egypt.

Page 248

the last recorded use of a pig against a war elephant was said to have occurred at the siege of Edessa, held by the Romans in the time of the emperor Justinian (sixth century AD). Chosroes, king of the Persians, stormed the city, sending his biggest elephant with many soldiers on top right up to the circuit wall. Just as the Persians were about to clamber over the wall and capture the city, the quick- witted Romans grabbed up a pig and suspended it directly in the face of the startled elephant. The dry- witted historian Procopius writes, “As the pig was hanging there, he very naturally gave vent to sundry squeals, and this angered the elephant so that he got out of control.” Confusion swept back in waves through the entire Persian army, and, panic- stricken, they fled in great disorder.

7. Infernal Fire

Page 275

Another celebrated weapon invented by Archimedes was essentially a heat ray used against the Roman navy commanded by Claudius Marcellus. According to ancient accounts, Archimedes had soldiers polish the concave surfaces of their bronze shields to a mirror finish. Then he assembled them to stand in a parabola shape and tip their shields to create a huge reflective surface to focus the sun’s rays onto the Roman ships’ riggings. Just as paper or matchsticks can be burned with a magnifying glass, the intense heat of the concentrated rays caused the sails and wooden masts to catch fire instantaneously. Marcellus’s fleet was reduced to ashes. The Roman commander gave up the naval blockade and finally captured Syracuse “by thirst.”

Page 276

Since the Enlightenment, many scientists have undertaken complex calculations and experiments to learn whether Archimedes’s method could have worked.

Page 276

The first series of experiments, by Count Buffon of the Paris Museum of Natural History in 1747, used mirrors to ignite a pine plank 150 feet away. A more recent test was carried out in 1975 by a Greek scientist, Dr. I. Sakkas. He lined up sixty Greek sailors each holding a mirror shaped like an oblong shield. In concert, they tilted the mirrors to direct the sun’s rays at a wooden ship 160 feet away. It caught fire immediately. A similarly successful re- creation was enacted in 2005 for the popular TV show MythBusters, when Dr. David Wallace of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology used mirrors to ignite a 1924 wooden fishing boat in San Francisco Bay.

Page 280

ancient claims that vinegar and fire could destroy walls and the story of Hannibal’s feat were long ridiculed as legends, until scientific experiments in 1992 proved that rocks heated to high temperatures will indeed fracture if a considerable quantity of acidic vinegar is splashed on the hot stone. Further experiments with sour red wine (the source of vinegar in antiquity) produced even more violent results, as the hot rocks sizzled and cracked apart. The scientists found that the chemical reaction worked best on limestone and marble, which happened to be the favorite building stone for ancient fortification walls.

Page 291

Sulfur, quicklime, and other substances were combined to make what was known in Latin as pyr automaton, “automatic or self- lighting fire.” The combination was first used to produce pyrotechnic tricks staged by priests and magicians. In 186 BC, for example, the historian Livy reported that during a religious ceremony, torches drenched in sulfur, tar, and quicklime continued to burn after being plunged into the Tiber River. Other Latin authors provided recipes for pyr automaton in which sulfur, pitch, quicklime, and naphtha were tightly sealed in containers and then ignited with a single drop of water. Naphtha is the highly flammable light fraction of petroleum, an extremely volatile, strong- smelling vaporous or gaseous liquid common in oil deposits of the Near East. It was the quicklime that caused the mixture to ignite with a drop of water.

Page 295

The method of gathering this combustible substance was cloaked in fable, probably created to keep it a state secret. Only the king of India was allowed to possess the special oil that derived from giant “worms” lurking in the Indus River, reported Ctesias. The power of the oil was marvelous: “If you want to burn up a man or an animal, just pour some oil over him and at once he is set on fire.” With this weapon, Ctesias heard, the Indian king captures cities without the use of battering rams or siege engines. He simply fills clay vessels with the oil, seals them up, and slings them against the city gates. Upon impact, the oil oozes down and fire pours over the doors. The miraculous oil consumes enemy siege machines and covers the fighting men with fire. Water cannot put it out; the only hope is to smother the flames with dirt.

Page 303

In AD 813, Baghdad, the Islamic capital, was totally destroyed by a new type of special forces to wield petroleum weaponry. Naphtha troops called naffatun manned hundreds of mangonels catapulting thousands of barrels of liquid fire. By AD 850, every Islamic army maintained regular naffatun units, and they were now protected by special fireproof uniforms and padding. Their gear was woven of the mysterious substance they called hajar al- fatila, asbestos, the fibrous rock impervious to flame discovered by Muslims in Tajikistan in the 800s. The invention of the fireproof uniforms led to a novel form of Islamic psychological warfare that brought Alexander’s legendary naphtha- filled iron horses and riders to life. In an innovation worthy of today’s Hollywood stuntmen on fire, Muslim riders and horses were covered with asbestos padding and then doused in naphtha and set afire to terrify the enemy cavalry. Spectacular “burning men on horseback” feats are now featured in the World Nomad Games.

Page 305

Remarkable archaeological evidence of the destruction of Cairo in AD 1167– 68 by its own chemical weapons came to light in 1916. French and Egyptian archaeologists uncovered troves of the ceramic, fist- sized naphtha pots in the ruins of the old city. The grenades were of astonishing sophistication: they had been filled with volatile jellied naphtha (similar to napalm) and a crude gunpowder made of nitrates and sulfur.

Page 306

Naphtha bombs were especially difficult to aim and control, as the Umayyad Muslims learned during their siege of the holy city of Mecca in AD 683. In that battle, as they catapulted naphtha projectiles into the city, they tried to avoid the Ka’aba, the sanctuary of the Black Stone worshipped by Muslims. But the covering was struck and caught fire. The intense heat split the sacred Black Stone of Mecca into three pieces.

Page 307

Greek Fire’s origin is surrounded by fable. According to one legend, an angel whispered the formula to Constantine the Great, the first Christian emperor, in AD 300. But Greek Fire did not suddenly burst on the scene out of nowhere. Centuries of observations, insights, discoveries, and experiments with combustible sulfur, quicklime, and naphtha, under various names (liquid fire, maltha, pyr automaton or automatic, artificial, or prepared fire, sea fire, wild fire, flying fire, oleum incendiarium, fierce fire oil, water- white, naft abyad, and so on), ultimately led to the invention of the naval incendiary that was dubbed “Greek Fire” by the Crusaders in the 1200s. Naphtha had been a tool of siege craft since Assyrian times. With mangonels and naffatun, naphtha weaponry reached its peak performance in land engagements, but inventions in Syria and Constantinople (modern Istanbul) perfected naphtha armaments for battles at sea. According to what survives in Islamic and Byzantine chronicles, it was the development of effective distillation and siphon pump technologies that enabled a flammable petroleum mixture to be stored and then propelled under pressure from boats, thus introducing the deployment of “something new, dreadful, launchable, and flammable,” in the words of the historian Alfred Crosby.

Page 308

Basically, Greek Fire was a weapon system for blasting ships in naval engagements. The complex weapon consisted of a refined chemical ammunition and an ingenious delivery system of cauldrons, siphons, tubes, and pumps.

Page 308

The main ingredient of the ammunition was naphtha, originally used as an incendiary poured over or hurled in pots at besiegers in Mesopotamia, and later in firebombs catapulted by mangonels invented in Damascus and used by Muslims to bombard fortifications, as described above. The Byzantines had used small siphons and syringes to squirt petroleum incendiaries as early as AD 513. But the new technology of pumping pressurized, distilled naphtha through bronze tubes at ships was achieved through brilliant chemical engineering by a Greek “petroleum consultant” named Kallinikos. Fleeing the Muslim occupation of Syria, Kallinikos sought refuge in Constantinople in about AD 668 and taught the Byzantines his invention. Greek Fire was first used to break the Muslim navy’s seven- year siege of Constantinople begun in AD 673, and the weapon saved the city again from the Muslim fleet in AD 718.77 The exact details of Kallinikos’s formula and delivery system are lost to modern science, and historians and chemists who try to reconstruct how the device worked disagree on the exact composition of the naphtha ammunition and the system design.

Page 309

The precise formula of the ammunition matters less than the amazing delivery system, which was capable of shooting liquid fire from swiveling nozzles mounted on small boats without the benefit of modern thermometers, safety valves, and pressure gauges (see plate 10). 78

Page 309

Partington, a historian of Greek Fire, compared the ancient reaction of horror to the modern dread of the atomic bomb. In 1139, the Second Lateran Council, following ideas of chivalry and honorable war, decreed that Greek Fire or similar burning weapons were “too murderous” to be used in Europe. The council’s decision was respected for some centuries, but the issue may have been moot since the formula for Greek Fire seems to have already been lost by then. The recipe was rekindled in a treatise published for Napoleon, with the chilling title Weapons for the Burning of Armies.

Afterword. The Many-Headed Hydra

Page 322

Take, for instance, the anthrax, bubonic plague, smallpox, and other supergerms created, tested, and dumped at the world’s largest bioweapons laboratory, established in 1948 on Vozrozhdeniya Island in the Aral Sea. The lab was one of eighteen weaponized pathogen Biopreparat centers scattered around the former Soviet Union. At the time, the Aral Sea was the fourth largest lake in the world. But by 2014, the Aral Sea had almost completely dried up and is now called the Aralkum Desert. The pathogenic weapons thought to be confined to the island have poisoned the air and water of Uzbekistan and Kazakhstan. Of the environmental disasters in the region that have been made public, the sudden death of five hundred thousand steppe antelopes in just one hour in 1988 is striking, and the Aral Smallpox Incident of 1971, affecting humans in the region, came to public notice only in 2002. That same year, ten of Vozrozhdeniya’s anthrax dumps were reportedly decontaminated. But animals and humans could still contract and spread the hypervirulent plagues buried in what was once an island.

Page 324

A geologic solution on a massive scale was proposed in 2002, when plans were developed to bury a huge cache of radioactive material deep under Yucca Mountain in Nevada, in the desert about a hundred miles northwest of Las Vegas. The seventy thousand tons of nuclear material (requiring forty miles of tunnels) are expected to remain dangerously radioactive for one hundred thousand years. The idea was to make the toxic sepulcher impregnable for at least ten thousand years, until the year AD 12,000.

Victoria: The Woman who Made the Modern World by Julia Baird

Victoria is an interesting piece. It’s written by journalist Julia Baird (whose sibling, incidentally, is Mike Baird, former premier of NSW – which perhaps explains why she was able to get the governor-general of Australia to advocate on her behalf for archive access). While the majority of Baird’s career and writing is as a journalist, she has a PhD in history, and it shows – this is a substantial biography. Having said that, it’s not too heavy – Baird does an excellent job of making it readable, moving through an entire lifetime at a pace that both examines the key issues, but does so without getting bogged down in detail. It’s an impressive book.

Baird deliberately sets out to write a piece about Victoria the person – as part of that, she examines her relationships, her growth and change, her challenges (being both monarch and a woman in a deeply patriarchal society, among others), her relationships (with both John Brown and Abdul Karim, amongst others), and her impacts and legacy. But it’s less a piece about Victorian politics and power – which is understandable, and out of scope given what Baird is interested in.

As someone who wanted to read more about Victorian politics, this is an interesting and accessible entrypoint, and if you’re interested in the history (but don’t yet have your PhD in it), this is well worth a read.

Quotes

THE TEENAGE QUEEN

CHAPTER 7  The Coronation: “A Dream out of The Arabian Nights” > Page 124

Down below in Hyde Park, actors impersonating the queen and her entourage tried to enact the scene exactly the same way at the same time, as the beer- swilling audience shouted encouragement.

CHAPTER 8  Learning to Rule > Page 131

Lord Melbourne was an unlikely leader, made prime minister for the second time two years before Victoria became queen largely because he was the least offensive candidate. He was not passionate about politics and couldn’t muster sufficient energy to care about social ills, let alone combat them. At times, when reformers visited him to put the case for improvements such as narrowing the death penalty or introducing compulsory education, he would pull feathers out of a pillow, toss them up in the air, and blow them across the top of his desk as they spoke.

CHAPTER 8  Learning to Rule > Page 132

Just a few years into their marriage, William Lamb began receiving anonymous letters telling him of his wife’s adultery. Caroline’s best- known lover was the glamorous poet Lord Byron, who was being feted by London after the publication of his adventures began in 1812, in Childe Harold’s Pilgrimage. Caroline read it immediately and, after insisting they meet, declared him to be, in a phrase that has been immortalized since, “mad, bad and dangerous to know.”

CHAPTER 8  Learning to Rule > Page 132

They wrote reams of love letters— to one, lying in a folder in the archives of the British Library, Caroline attached a bloodied clipping of her own pubic hair— and attempted to elope (some still believe they were married in secret).

CHAPTER 8  Learning to Rule > Page 135

The irony was that Melbourne was a Whig. Previous Whig PMs, most notably Lord Grey between 1830 and 1834, had enacted welfare laws, ended slavery, and expanded the vote. But Melbourne even once told Archbishop Whately that he would have done “nothing at all” about slavery.

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 145

The fact that it had been considered necessary to establish, crudely, that Lady Flora was still a virgin, in a virgin queen’s court, was a gross violation of her dignity and honor. When Lady Flora’s brother, the Marquess of Hastings, heard, he rushed to London to determine who was to blame, to insist on reparation, and to defend his family’s honor. He saw Lord Melbourne and baldly told Victoria she had received bad advice and needed to find out who the originator of the slander was so that they might be brought to punishment.

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 146

Lady Flora’s mother decided to appeal to the queen. On March 7, the Dowager Marchioness of Hastings wrote a strong letter to Victoria— through the Duchess of Kent— seeking her help. She asked her to refute “the slanders” with an act designed to show her indignation, and ended: “To a female sovereign especially, women of all ranks in Britain look with confidence for protection and (notwithstanding the difference of their rank) for sympathy.” But Victoria had no sympathy; she decided the letter was foolish and, provocatively, sent it back to her mother without a word. This error of judgment would incite the beginning of a relentless, vitriolic, and public campaign by the Hastings family to expose the royal court and demand accountability. The dowager, who was unwell and mortified by what had happened to her daughter, then wrote to Lord Melbourne, asking for the removal of Dr. Clark. Melbourne responded that her demand was “so unprecedented and objectionable” that he would not reply to it, only deigning to confirm receipt of her letter. Next the Hastings family went to the press. On March 24, Lady Flora’s uncle sent the Examiner an account of the affair based on a letter his niece had sent him; it was published in full. Lady Flora blamed the Whig ladies- in- waiting, as well as “a certain foreign lady, whose hatred to the Duchess is no secret.”

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 148

The problem was also political: the queen and her prime minister were Whigs and Lady Flora was a Tory. The paranoia of the Tories was fueled, and many Whigs believed this scandal was used as political leverage to cast aspersions on an unmarried queen and her ladies, as well as on the prime minister.

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 148

Three days earlier, on May 6, Lord Melbourne’s political career had been dealt a fatal blow; his government won by only five votes a vote on a bill that would have enforced antislavery legislation in the Jamaican sugar trade. (The slenderness of the majority was enough to undermine his leadership.) Since then, it had been clear that Peel was the obvious choice for PM— and that he did not have the full support of his queen. No, she said to him, she would not remove any of the Whig ladies in her bedchamber simply because he was now prime minister.

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 151

She refused Peel’s suggestion of changing only the senior ladies— the Mistress of the Robes had precedence over the other ladies— arguing that this had never been done before. Could it be right that her household attendants be plucked from her grasp simply because the government had changed? Her ladies were hardly politicians. (She repeatedly said that this had not happened to a queen before; Peel insisted it was different because she was queen regnant. He was right— there had been no woman as sovereign since 1714— but no queen has been asked to do the same since.)

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 152

Peel then bluntly told Victoria that if she did not agree to remove some of her ladies, who were married to some of his most vehement enemies, he could not form a government. Victoria, pleased by the prospect of Lord Melbourne returning, told Peel her mind was made up and she would write to him in a few hours or in the morning to give him her final decision.

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 153

The campaign by the Hastings family had been successful; public sympathy was clearly with Lady Flora, who kept appearing in public so that people would not think she was pregnant. The distressed Duchess of Kent was convinced that Lady Flora was going to die, but even in June, Victoria was still dismissing Lady Flora’s condition as a “bilious attack.”

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 155

Lady Flora made her last wish as her weeping family surrounded her: that a postmortem be conducted on her body that would finally, thoroughly prove her innocence. There were still rumblings in the court about a stillborn child. Even on the morning of her death, a protester wrote on a placard that Lady Flora died of a botched abortion. But the autopsy report, which Victoria waited anxiously for all day, showed Lady Flora had a grossly enlarged liver, which was pressing on her stomach. It also reported that “the uterus and its appendages presented the usual appearances of the healthy virgin state.” Even in death, her chastity was probed. Public fury was revived by the news; Victoria and Melbourne were hissed at in public, hats stayed on when the queen’s carriage wheeled past in a gesture of disrespect, and voices stayed quiet when the royal toast was given amid whispers of murder.

CHAPTER 9  A Scandal in the Palace > Page 155

The queen had not been thinking of her subjects. For the first time in her life, she had been part of a clique, and it was a powerful one; and the pull of scandal, revenge, and bitchy gossip had been too great.

ALBERT: THE MAN SOME CALLED KING

CHAPTER 10  Virago in Love > Page 178

After the pro- Catholic King James II was hurled off the throne in the Glorious Revolution of 1688 and replaced by the Protestant William III, an act was passed that prohibited any English monarch from being a Catholic, or marrying one. This is still the case today. Albert was a strict Lutheran with a strong personal faith, but Catholics dominated his family. Suspicions were raised when Victoria’s address to the Privy Council did not have the word “Protestant” in it. (Foolishly, given the intense anti- Catholicism in the country and Victoria’s crucial position as Defender of the Faith, Melbourne had advised taking it out.) After the Duke of Wellington raised the matter in Parliament, and the Tory papers made snide remarks, it was reinserted in the official version.

CHAPTER 10  Virago in Love > Page 183

She must not forget to tell Albert, she thought, as the seamstress pinned ivory folds to her now- slender torso, that he should not shave for the wedding. If there was one thing she would insist upon, it would be that he keep the thin mustache he had when she met him. She was so impressed by it that she told Lord Melbourne that all the cavalry should be made to grow one, which Melbourne “saw no objection to.” She wanted it to be part of an official uniform. It is a curious image: rows of uniformed men on horseback, all wearing identical narrow mustaches because of an infatuated young queen.

CHAPTER 11  The Bride: “I Never, Never Spent Such an Evening” > Page 189

Victoria had chosen to wear white mostly because it was the perfect color to highlight the delicate lace— it was not then a conventional color for brides. Before bleaching techniques were mastered, white was a rare and expensive color, more a symbol of wealth than purity. Victoria was not the first to wear it, but she made it popular by example.

CHAPTER 11  The Bride: “I Never, Never Spent Such an Evening” > Page 190

Victoria had a clutch of farcical, fixated stalkers, some of whom grew quite distressed by the upcoming nuptials. Several were committed. One devoted man stationed himself outside the gates of Kensington Palace and followed her carriage when it appeared each day. Another, Ned Hayward, sent a torrent of letters to the Home Office desperately seeking to propose to Victoria. He finally tried to stop her horse to hand a letter to her himself, but was arrested. Another gentleman, believing that he was the rightful king and that Victoria would be an excellent housekeeper, climbed over the Windsor Castle gate and declared, “I demand entrance into the castle as the king of England.”

CHAPTER 13  The Palace Intruders > Page 228

They found an archaic and extraordinarily inefficient structure, with responsibility split between the Lord Chamberlain and Lord Steward, with some input from the Master of the Horse and the Office of Woods and Works. Lamps in Buckingham Palace were provided by the Lord Chamberlain’s office, cleaned by the Lord Steward’s office, and, mostly, lit by the Master of the Horse. The windows were always dirty, as the inside and outside were never cleaned at the same time: while the Lord Chamberlain’s office was responsible for the interior of the palace, the Office of Woods and Works was in charge of the exterior. The Lord Steward’s staff prepared and laid the fires, while the Lord Chamberlain’s lit them. Broken windows and cupboards were unattended to for months because before fixing them, the chief cook had to prepare and sign a requisition, which then needed to be signed by the Master of the Household, authorized by the Lord Chamberlain’s Office, and given to the Clerk of the Works, under the Office of Woods and Forests.

CHAPTER 13  The Palace Intruders > Page 229

Albert identified a series of scams and perks that servants had abused for decades: people outside the palace often forged the signatures of the queen’s ladies when ordering carriages, charging the cost of their ride to the royal household; fresh candles were put out each day while the footmen pocketed the previous day’s, many unlit; and expensive staff dinners were offered to those with only tenuous connections to the royal court. Albert slashed salaries, sometimes by as much as two- thirds, to account for the fact that many servants worked in the palace for only half the year.

CHAPTER 13  The Palace Intruders > Page 232

In June, when Melbourne’s government lost a debate on foreign sugar duties, Peel forced a vote of no confidence and Parliament was dissolved.

CHAPTER 13  The Palace Intruders > Page 233

Victoria overtly displayed her bias by visiting influential Whig houses during the elections, but to little effect. The Conservatives returned with a large majority on August 19. For the first time, the queen did not go to the opening session.

CHAPTER 13  The Palace Intruders > Page 237

Baroness Lehzen and Albert clashed repeatedly as she tried to protect her territory and he tried to expand his. Stockmar told Lord Granville that Lehzen was “foolish” to contest Albert’s influence, and not to recognize that her position was different now that Victoria was married. Even Leopold, once a friend, described her as a “great future danger” for Albert.

CHAPTER 13  The Palace Intruders > Page 238

When she neglected to tell Albert that Captain Childers, one of the queen’s courtiers, had fallen in love with the queen, he accused her of incompetence. Lehzen insisted she had told the Lord Chamberlain instead of Albert only because Albert had been so rude to her that it was impossible to talk to him. When a woman like Lehzen threatened Albert’s authority, he became unusually nasty. She was generally viewed, as Albert’s biographer Roger Fulford put it, as a “spinster gremlin.” Albert referred to her as die Blaste— the hag— in letters to his brother. When she got jaundice that Christmas, he called her “the Yellow lady.” Albert blamed her for Victoria’s shortcomings: what he believed to be a substandard education— even though she was a better linguist, fluent in English, German, and French, with some Italian— and her anxiety about conversations with scholars and politicians much older than she. He was particularly critical of Victoria in the months before Lehzen left, but once she was gone, Albert described her to his brother as “the most perfect companion a man could wish for.”

CHAPTER 13  The Palace Intruders > Page 241

Albert was infuriated and appalled by such a public scene. Muttering “I must have patience,” he returned to his rooms and refused to talk to Victoria for days. Stockmar acted as an intermediary. Victoria wrote to him that same day, immediately contrite, saying the argument was like a bad dream.

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 250

It was approaching 4: 30 P.M. Police had lined the street since one o’clock, holding back the dense crowd, who noisily cheered any member of Parliament who opposed the Corn Laws. Inside Westminster, Peel walked into the House of Commons, bowed gracefully to the Speaker, and walked to the center of the Treasury Bench.

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 250

A hush descended when Prince Albert entered the Strangers’ Gallery. Lord George Bentinck, a Tory with a passion for horse racing, rolled his eyes: Did this German prince really think he could bring royal favor into the debate? First it was the queen with Melbourne; now, Albert with Peel? It seemed highly irregular, and wrong, to have this interference from the monarchy.

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 252

(Repeal was not, it should be noted, an individual achievement. The Anti– Corn Law League, which came largely from the middle class, was a polished, well- funded, and unified political group. The group’s leaders were clever orators and effective in placing aristocrats on the defensive by castigating them as wealthy landowners, inert politicians, and morally bankrupt leaders. Middle- class opinion was marshaled and aristocrats were criticized in a way they never had been before; it was a significant political shift.)

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 254

In the 1840s, political attention was turning, in general, to the way the working class lived and worked. In May 1842, the first parliamentary report on the employment of children was accompanied by shocking illustrations of six- year- olds chained to coal carts. According to the report, the youngest children employed were responsible for ventilating the mines, keeping the trapdoors shut until a coal car needed to pass through, then opening and shutting them correctly. These children, called trappers, were aged between four and ten. The Examiner reported that what they hated most was the dark in the dungeons: they used to beg colliers for candle stubs. Women and older children were put to use drawing the coal carts along passageways too narrow for grown men. They crawled along the ground like animals through puddles and piles of rocks. The girls sometimes worked stripped to the waist like the boys, men often went naked in the intense heat, and rape and sexual assault were common in the mines and pits. There were concerns that women who worked there would no longer be suitable for marriage.

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 257

While Albert labored over plans to lift people out of poverty and to improve the housing of the working class, Victoria needed more visual, immediate, individual prompting.

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 262

When the couple traveled on a train for the first time, a short trip from Slough to London in 1843, Albert suffered motion sickness and was unsettled by the speed of forty- four miles per hour. Victoria loved it: “I find the motion so very easy, far more so than a carriage and cannot understand how any one can suffer from it.”

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 263

It would be wrong to assume, as some have, that Albert’s efforts and opinions obliterated Victoria’s. When it came to matters such as religious tolerance, for example, Victoria had firm opinions from an early age. When Robert Peel wanted to improve tertiary education for Catholics and provide more funding for the Catholic Maynooth training college for priests, Victoria supported him despite the surge of protest in England. She was remarkably progressive about religion: “I blush for the form of religion we profess, that it should be so void of all right feeling, & so wanting in Charity. Are we to drive these 700,000 Roman Catholics, who are badly educated, to desperation & violence?” Victoria praised Peel for standing up against a “tide of bigotry, and blind fanaticism.”

CHAPTER 14  King to All Intents: “Like a Vulture into His Prey” > Page 264

Peel’s Corn Law triumph cost him his career. On June 25, the prime minister lost an important vote in the House of Commons, partly because the protectionists had combined to vote against him. He resigned and retired, and the Whigs came to power once more. The queen, who had grown fond of Peel, told him she and the prince considered him “a kind and true friend.”

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 285

The royal family retreated to the woods of Osborne, where they awaited news from London with some trepidation.

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 285

The hero- worshipped, elderly Duke of Wellington was placed in charge of the army once again, for the last time. The government seized control of the telegraphic system to ensure that revolutionaries could not broadcast false information, and a Removal of Aliens Act was rushed through Parliament to give the home secretary powers to remove any foreign citizen against whom allegations had been made. The Chartists boasted of a petition bearing five million names, so enormous it was rolled up like a large bundle of hay and pulled by four horses. They hoped for revolution, but at the very least they planned to wring some compromises out of Parliament. On April 10, under a bright blue sky, the Chartists trekked to four meeting points around London, holding banners that read LIVE AND LET LIVE. A phalanx of four thousand Metropolitan Police surrounded Kennington Common— formerly used for public executions and cricket matches— and a further eight thousand regular troops were hidden at various points around London. Four batteries of artillery were installed along bridges, and armed ships were anchored at key points along the Thames. Armed men lined the Mall to prevent access to Buckingham Palace. Prime Minister Lord John Russell lined his windows with parliamentary papers, and his pregnant wife accompanied him to the safety of Downing Street for fear the sound of cannons firing would trigger early labor. In the empty government buildings, which were barricaded with boxes of papers, men with guns hid behind pillars and curtains, peering out every few minutes to see if the rioting had begun. The troops were told to fire if necessary.

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 286

He could have ordered the Chartists to attack, in the hope that troops and police would crumble and defect as they had in many European countries, but his instincts told him this was futile. On the day of the protest, his fears were confirmed: only twenty- three thousand turned up, just one- tenth the number hoped for.

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 289

The foreign secretary at this time was Lord Palmerston, a man who had an unshakable belief in his own diplomatic skills. Known as Lord Cupid because he had charmed women as a bachelor, in 1848 he was still a good- looking fifty- four- year- old, now married to Lord Melbourne’s clever sister Emily. The queen had found him pleasant when she was a teenager, but now she and Albert were suspicious of him. One winter’s night in 1839, he was found in the bedrooms of one of the ladies- in- waiting, allegedly forcing himself upon her before screams rang through the corridors and he fled the room. Palmerston insisted he was merely lost; in truth, he was simply letting himself into a room he thought was occupied by Lady Emily Lamb, to whom he was then engaged. Albert remained uncertain, though, and used the story to argue against Palmerston a decade later.

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 290

On August 20, 1848, Victoria wrote a reprimanding letter to Palmerston after discovering that a “private letter” addressed to her had been “cut open at the Foreign Office.” She reproached him again a few days later for failing to update her on the feud between Austria and Sardinia. A series of high- minded, dictatorial dispatches by Palmerston to Spain and then Portugal— which ignored the advice of the prime minister, the man who was his superior— also infuriated the queen. Palmerston was eager to help pry Italy away from Austria and make Venice a republic, which Victoria thought abominable: Why help these foreign rebels when they were wrestling with their own rebels in Ireland?

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 293

For Victoria, hierarchy was divine: men were the heads of their households, and the sovereign was the head of state. She believed that peace in both her marriage and her country required obedience— even though her own was rarely forthcoming. A strong strain of liberal sympathy had emerged in Europe, but for now, her country was safe, and little had changed.

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 293

In Ireland, the 1848 potato crop had again failed and people on the streets of Dublin were crying for food. The British Parliament was so nervous about the possibility of rebellion that they suspended habeas corpus so that people in Ireland could be arrested without a warrant. The subterranean anger in the impoverished country threatened only to get worse. In 1848, made nervous by events in Europe, Victoria was of the firm belief that any restive Irish should be “crushed” and taught a lesson. Even then, her views were considered strident.

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 295

He was known for his dislike of the aristocracy, and he was clear about the purpose of his work: “The unequal division of property, and the dangers of poverty and envy arising therefrom, is the principal evil. Means must necessarily be found, not for diminishing riches (as the communists wish), but to make facilities for the poor. But there is the rub.” Such remarks show that Albert was grappling with the questions raised by the European revolutions— and hoping to stem local unrest by addressing them.

CHAPTER 16  Annus Mirabilis: The Revolutionary Year > Page 297

Britain avoided revolution for several reasons: a loyal middle class who loved their queen, a government that applied force ruthlessly when needed, and canny politicians like Peel who introduced laws lowering the cost of food. Plus, by transporting the most radical dissenters to far- off colonies such as Australia, the government was able to siphon off some of the greatest political leaders of the Irish independence and Chartist movements.

CHAPTER 17  What Albert Did: The Great Exhibition of 1851 > Page 303

Henry Cole, an energetic civil servant famed for making the first Christmas card and helping to launch the penny post.

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 316

The Crimean War was, in many respects, an unnecessary one. “God forbid!” Victoria had cried, when she first mentioned the possibility of conflict. Few could fathom why Britain should rush to defend Turkey against Russia— they had little in common with either country and there had been peace in Europe for forty years, since the end of the Napoleonic Wars in 1815. But the Russian czar Nicholas I— a despot who ruled over a backward country populated by more than twenty- two million serfs— was now eyeing the weakening Ottoman Empire to his south. Over the past few decades, the Ottoman— or Turkish— Empire had stagnated economically, had been slow to modernize, and had endured a series of ineffective governments that too readily capitulated to the demands of European countries. Czar Nicholas called it the “sick man of Europe” and wanted to carve it up and distribute the spoils. It was a geographically crucial region: Constantinople linked Europe with Asia by land and sea; it was there that the Black Sea met the Mediterranean. If Russia were to edge south into Turkey, it could potentially block crucial chains of supply— especially Britain’s route to India— and expand its sea power through its naval base at Sevastopol.

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 318

Victoria fretted about leaving London for Scotland at the end of the summer of 1853 while talk of war simmered, but she was assured by Lord Aberdeen— who had been made prime minister in 1852— that she would not be excluded from crucial decisions. She was outraged, then, to discover in October that Lord Palmerston had persuaded the prime minister to send troops to the Black Sea in a defensive position of war, without seeking her consent. Albert was also urgently concerned about a drift toward conflict. He wanted the four neutral powers— Britain, France, Prussia, and Austria— to act in concert to avoid it. He also worried about the precariousness of an exclusive alliance with France. The couple left Balmoral immediately and returned to Windsor to demand an explanation from Lord Aberdeen.

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 318

Victoria was increasingly concerned that England was assuming the risks of a European war, offering support to Turkey without having bound it to any conditions. She furiously lobbied her ministers, but she was unable to slow the momentum to fight.

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 319

With defter diplomacy, the involvement of Britain and France could easily have been avoided. But public opinion had been whipped into a frenzy.

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 324

Victoria’s wartime diary reveals how frequently those around her spun even the worst news into something positive, how eager the generals were to assure her that their men did not mind suffering for their country. Sir John McNeill, who had been sent to investigate the Crimean hospitals as a sanitary commissioner, gave Victoria “most interesting, gratifying, & comforting accounts of the state of the brave Army” and downplayed the newspaper reports. He described the army camp as a kind of Eden: “The Camp was one of the happiest imaginable; singing, dancing, playing games went on, & there was an incredible disregard of danger: ‘the soldiers no more minded shot & bullets, than apples & pears.’ . . . There is not ‘one man in that Army, who would not gladly give up his life to prove his devotion to Yr Majesty.’”

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 333

In 1857, Albert was at last made Prince Consort, to Victoria’s great satisfaction.

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 335

An inevitable part of being a queen at a time of national crisis is incongruity. As the violence and bloodshed continued in the Crimea, Victoria wrote about the moonlight on the sea, the snow, blooms, blue skies, and the “peculiar and soothing effect” of a sunny week at Osborne. As soldiers sailed for the East and shivered on hillsides without tents or warm clothes, Victoria was hunting for Easter eggs with the children, playing with stuffed mice, and hiding quietly in the heather as Albert hunted deer.

CHAPTER 18  The Crimea: “This Unsatisfactory War” > Page 336

Victoria’s mother, the Duchess of Kent, was now a doting grandmother and a crucial part of the family, their estrangement long forgotten. Both mother and daughter looked back on the conflict caused by Conroy with regret. The duchess wrote to Victoria that the death of Conroy in 1854 grieved her: “[ He] has been of great use to me, but unfortunately has also done great harm.” She went on to ask her daughter not to dwell on the past, when “passions of those who stood between us” had sparked mistrust. A wiser Victoria reassured her mother that those days were long gone.

CHAPTER 19  Royal Parents and the Dragon of Dissatisfaction > Page 339

So- called mud larks, usually children of seven or eight, collected rubbish from the river, roaming the banks and pipe ends with kettles and baskets dangling from their arms, hunting for pieces of coal or wood, copper nails, or any salable rubbish.

CHAPTER 19  Royal Parents and the Dragon of Dissatisfaction > Page 349

On January 27, 1859, Victoria became a grandmother. She ran along the castle corridors to tell Albert about the birth of Vicky’s first child, Frederick William Victor Albert, the future Kaiser Wilhelm II. Victoria then sent out a flurry of telegrams as bells rang in the town below Windsor Castle and illuminations flared. She had at first been horrified to discover her daughter had become pregnant so quickly; she called it “horrid news.” Vicky, sounding like her father’s daughter, responded that she was proud to create an immortal soul. Victoria rolled her eyes at the suggestion that birth was some kind of spiritual endeavor: “I think much more of our being like a cow or a dog at such moments; when our poor nature becomes so very animal and unecstatic.”

CHAPTER 19  Royal Parents and the Dragon of Dissatisfaction > Page 350

It was only when Vicky came to visit in May 1859 that Victoria learned that her grandson’s left arm had been injured at birth and hung weakly from its socket, paralyzed. When Victoria finally met little Willy in 1860 on a trip to Germany, she described him as a “fine fat child, with a beautiful white soft skin.” Victoria was an adoring grandmother, who believed her children’s offspring to be “the best children I ever saw.”

CHAPTER 19  Royal Parents and the Dragon of Dissatisfaction > Page 352

The abstract, philosophical nature of Prince Albert’s brain is illustrated in his letters to Vicky. When she said she was homesick, for example, her mother warmly assured her she was missed. But her father wrote an analysis of the condition of homesickness. Assuring her it was a natural state, he explained it was “a painful yearning, which might exist quite independently of, and simultaneously with, complete contentment and complete happiness.” It was a dualism, he said, in which “the new I” cannot disconnect from “the I which has been”: “Hence, the painful struggle, I might almost say, spasm of the soul.”

CHAPTER 19  Royal Parents and the Dragon of Dissatisfaction > Page 361

On Victoria’s forty- second birthday, in 1861, she asked that no music be played outside her window. She wanted only to relish Albert’s “tender love and affection,” in what had become an intimate birthday ritual.

THE WIDOW OF WINDSOR

CHAPTER 20  “There Is No One to Call Me Victoria Now” > Page 367

“Fast women” were increasingly common in the 1860s, a decade of a forgotten but determined progress toward emancipation. Single women began to rebel in greater numbers: smoking, flirting openly, mixing freely with unmarried men. Books of that era are peppered with complaints about the looseness of the younger generations. Some young women even embraced the term “fast,” which was astonishing to polite society. One novelist wrote: “Oh, that any British maiden should unblushingly, nay, and without the slightest feeling of shame, even glory in such a title! But so it is, in the year 1861.” Even in 1868, while traveling in Switzerland, Victoria noticed among a crowd who gathered to see her “independent young English ladies, specimens of the present most objectionable ‘fast young lady.’” She added: “Some were no doubt American.”

CHAPTER 21  “The Whole House Seems Like Pompeii” > Page 389

Victoria hung his photo above his side of the bed. Each day, servants carefully laid out his ironed shirts and pants in the Blue Room and provided clean towels and hot water for shaving, which grew cold as his clock ticked and blotting paper sat unmarked.

CHAPTER 21  “The Whole House Seems Like Pompeii” > Page 396

Lord Palmerston once quipped that there were only three people who understood the Schleswig- Holstein conflict: the Prince Consort, who was now dead; a German professor who had gone mad; and himself, who had now forgotten it.

CHAPTER 22  Resuscitating the Widow of Windsor > Page 406

John Bright, the radical leader of the Reform League that sought an expansion of the suffrage, spoke at mass meetings across England. In 1867, the Second Reform Bill— which doubled the number of men who could vote in England and Wales from one to two million— was passed in Parliament. Victoria was wary of democratization, but she strongly supported the bill once it was evident that it had majority support in the House of Commons.

CHAPTER 22  Resuscitating the Widow of Windsor > Page 407

She frequently resisted hosting foreign dignitaries and asked the British government to pay if she did. In 1867, for example, the Earl of Derby, a Whig who had replaced Lord Palmerston as prime minister, begged the queen to postpone a trip to Osborne for three days so she could meet the sultan of Turkey for ten minutes at Buckingham Palace. Her response was scorching: “The word distasteful is hardly applicable to the subject; it would be rather nearer the mark to say extremely inconvenient and disadvantageous for the Queen’s health.” Still, she agreed to postpone her trip for two days, asked the sultan to come a day earlier, and dispatched her doctor to Lord Derby so he might relay the fragile state of her nerves, thus emphasizing again how great the burden was. She threatened again a “complete breakdown,” saying she refused to be bullied or dictated to.

CHAPTER 22  Resuscitating the Widow of Windsor > Page 411

Between 1871 and 1874, eighty- five Republican Clubs were founded in Britain, protesting, among other things, the “expensiveness and uselessness of the monarchy” and Bertie’s “immoral example.”

CHAPTER 22  Resuscitating the Widow of Windsor > Page 411

One of the greatest threats to public safety came from the Fenian Brotherhood, which was founded in America in 1858 with the aim of overthrowing British control of Ireland and establishing an Irish republic. In 1866, the Brotherhood unsuccessfully tried to invade Canada from America. In 1867, they began a campaign of terror in Britain, blowing up a prison wall and killing a policeman. Three members were executed in reprisal and became martyrs.

CHAPTER 23  The Queen’s Stallion > Page 419

She refused to defer trips to Balmoral, even when needed to open Parliament or manage a ministerial crisis. Sir Thomas Biddulph, the Keeper of the Privy Purse, said, “The Queen will talk as if she were Mrs. Jones and might live just where she liked.”

CHAPTER 24  The Faery Queen Awakes > Page 443

By Victoria’s rationale, the British Empire’s prestige would be upheld if Britain made it clear to Russia that they would protect Turkey’s interests if the Russians invaded Constantinople. Her Cabinet was divided on the subject, but Disraeli agreed; together they acted secretly to communicate this to the Russians in August 1877, an extraordinary act especially given that not even the foreign minister was aware of it.

REGINA IMPERATRIX

CHAPTER 25  Enough to Kill Any Man > Page 458

She had already given Ponsonby an extraordinary list of instructions for Gladstone— that he must not change the foreign policy, nor the British rule in India, cut projected spending, or bring in “democratic leaning.” Still, wrote Gladstone after his awkward meeting with the monarch, “All things considered, I was much pleased.”

CHAPTER 25  Enough to Kill Any Man > Page 459

Gladstone had also waged a staggering, unprecedented campaign strategy. In what became known as the Midlothian campaign, he pioneered American- style electioneering in Scotland, directly addressing crowds of thousands in a series of mass public meetings. He spoke in rousing, thunderous oratory, attacking Disraeli, focusing particularly on his “pestilent” foreign policy, which he saw as stamping on the rights of small countries to determine their fate. Ten thousand Zulus in Africa had been killed, Gladstone thundered, “for no other offence than their attempt to defend against your artillery with their naked bodies, their hearths and homes, their wives and families.” He also spoke of “the sanctity of life in the hill villages of Afghanistan.” Gladstone argued for virtue in foreign policy— meaning less intervention— and thereby tapped into the mood of fatigue among the electorate.

CHAPTER 25  Enough to Kill Any Man > Page 462

In January 1881, Victoria objected to words contained in her Speech from the Throne— text that had been given to her to read aloud, by Gladstone’s office— that declared British soldiers would leave Kandahar. She would not deliver the speech with those words contained in it; her ministers would not present it without them. After a heated Cabinet meeting at Osborne, several ministers threatened to resign. A furious Victoria said she had not been treated with “such want of respect” in all her years as queen. She glared stonily at her Cabinet, recording how they “nearly tumbled over each other going out.” The subject of the dispute was an important one— whom did the queen speak for when she opened Parliament?

CHAPTER 25  Enough to Kill Any Man > Page 466

By 1864, almost a third of all British troops were admitted to the hospital for syphilis or gonorrhea. Because it was not the soldiers who were blamed but the women they slept with, the solution decided upon was simple: the army and navy needed clean prostitutes. In 1864, the first of the Contagious Diseases Acts introduced official brothels for the military.

CHAPTER 25  Enough to Kill Any Man > Page 468

Yet, as one sex worker said after being imprisoned, “It did seem hard, ma’am, that the Magistrate on the bench who gave the casting vote for my imprisonment had paid me several shillings a day or two before, in the street, to go with him.”

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 484

sometimes Victoria did intervene successfully. In 1884, for example, Parliament was in gridlock over the Third Reform Bill, which extended the vote to agricultural workers. Victoria generally favored electoral reform, but she disliked the disruption it caused. She was sanguine about this bill but horrified by the calls of some Liberals for the abolition of the House of Lords. She called on Gladstone to restrain “some of his wild colleagues and followers,” and argued that the position of monarch would be “utterly untenable” if there was no balance of power left. Victoria had insisted the Liberals meet with the Tories, who were adamant they would pass the Reform Bill only if a redistribution bill was introduced at the same time. The meeting resulted in the House of Lords agreeing to pass the Reform Bill as a freshly negotiated redistribution bill was introduced into the lower house. Lord Granville praised the queen’s “powerful influence,” and Henry Ponsonby credited her for “incessant hammering at both sides to be moderate and insisting on their meeting.”

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 488

The government was defeated on a minor matter— a proposal to increase beer duty— but it had struggled with legitimacy ever since the death of General Gordon. The government was also deeply divided on the boiling question of Irish independence. Parliament was dissolved, and the Tory Lord Salisbury became prime minister— a role he would fulfill three times.

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 488

Salisbury was also the first of Victoria’s prime ministers to be younger than she was, and the last of the aristocratic politicians to lead the British government from the House of Lords.

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 490

Victoria’s intervention was extraordinary: she did not disguise her antipathy to Gladstone, she tried to push— and keep— him out of power, she actively sought to form other coalitions and governments, and she expected to have a pivotal say in who was selected for the Cabinet.

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 491

By the 1880s, the Irish Question dominated the British Parliament. Ireland was suffering from a protracted agricultural depression, ruinous bouts of famine, and relentless bursts of violence. Support for the Irish republican Fenians was growing. Even as early as the 1840s, before the potato famine, Gladstone had viewed Ireland as a “coming storm.”

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 494

But the moment went. On June 8, the bill was defeated, 341 to 311. The Liberals split, with 93 voting against. The Liberal Unionists separated from the Liberal Party and aligned with Conservatives in their opposition to Home Rule until 1914. Gladstone’s foresight was greater than his political skill, and he struggled to corral a sufficient number of colleagues.

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 494

Gladstone did not give up, even after he had resigned. In 1887, he wrote in his diary: “One prayer absorbs all others: Ireland, Ireland, Ireland.” He went on to fight for Home Rule again in the 1892 election, and managed to push through a watered- down bill in 1893: a version that was quickly, soundly rejected by the House of Lords. Gladstone’s commitment to Irish self- government was fascinating: principled yet politically impossible. The House of Lords would never have supported him. Instead of bringing unity to the Isles, he had split his party, and he would be blamed for keeping Liberals out of office for the better part of two decades.

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 495

The extent of her interference in politics— and the audacity of her reach— did not become apparent until the 1920s and 1930s, when the letters of the final years of her reign were published.

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 498

It is clear Victoria also believed she had the power to dismiss a prime minister, and ministry, though this was never exercised. When the king of Greece sacked his entire Cabinet in 1892 for “leading the country to bankruptcy,” Victoria thought he was entitled to do so: “but whether it is wise to exercise this right must depend on circumstances.”

CHAPTER 26  “Two Ironclads Colliding”: The Queen and Mr. Gladstone > Page 500

It is quite possible Victoria was jealous of Gladstone, as his secretary, Edward Hamilton, concluded, especially of his extraordinary hold over her subjects. She frequently cautioned him from campaigning as he had done in the Midlothian campaign. She told him to mind his words, treating him much like a teenager requiring perpetual monitoring, even though he was a decade older than she. She sent him notes before he was due to give big speeches: in 1881 she told him to be “very cautious,” in 1883 to be “very guarded in his language.”

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 507

Wilhelm was a proud, often cruel, and talentless man who harbored a particular kind of hatred for his mother. The painful breech birth Vicky had suffered meant he had to be wrenched from her womb, causing partial paralysis of his left arm due to nerve damage (this is now known as Erb’s palsy). This made his left arm fifteen centimeters shorter than his right, something he tried to disguise for years by resting it on swords or other props. The medical establishment was ill equipped to deal with such a disability, which was considered shameful at the time. The treatments used to try to repair his arm were horrific. One such treatment, first applied when he was a few months old, was “animal baths.” Twice a week, a hare was killed and sliced open; Wilhelm’s limp arm was slid inside the still- warm body in the hope that some of its life force would magically transfer to the baby boy. Willy was also jolted with electric shocks and strapped into a metal contraption that forced his head upright. He blamed his mother for his shame, and for his years of unsuccessful, painful treatments: he would never forgive her.

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 508

Even Chancellor Bismarck recognized Willy was too immature to rule, that he was impetuous, “susceptible to flattery and could plunge Germany into war without foreseeing or wishing it.” It turned out to be a matter of character, though, not maturity, for this was precisely what happened years later, when Wilhelm’s eagerness for war would far outstrip his competence at waging it.

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 509

Fritz knew he was already dismissed as dead; the hurt only deepened when Wilhelm’s siblings, Charlotte and Henry, switched to support their brother. Vicky complained to Victoria: “People in general consider us a mere passing shadow soon to be replaced by reality in the shape of William!” It seemed painfully unfair to Vicky that her own husband was so ill when he stood ready to inherit the throne; the emperor was now ninety, and sure to die soon. She was certain her husband would be a great, humane leader of Prussia, and a forceful advocate for parliamentary democracy.

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 510

Vicky was isolated and misunderstood; her British origins had made her deeply unpopular. Her private letters were leaked to the press and published in full. All three of her children also attacked her, accusing her of causing her father’s illness or of ensuring that his medical treatment was poor. Even when Vicky smiled, it was pointed to as evidence of callousness.

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 511

When Victoria walked into Fritz’s room, he handed her a nosegay; it would be the last time she would see him. She then saw Bismarck in her rooms at Charlottenburg Palace. (Lord Salisbury urged her to bring a minister with her, but she refused.) It is unclear exactly what happened during the forty- five minutes they spent alone together, but Bismarck wiped a handkerchief across his brow when he walked out. Shortly afterward, he declared, “Mein Gott! That was a woman! One could do business with her!” A man to whom the concept of female authority was anathema, Bismarck later amended his remarks to sound more patronizing: “Grandmama behaved quite sensibly at Charlottenburg.”

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 512

The nationalistic new kaiser was deeply ambivalent about Britain, which marked a significant shift in British- German relations. He dressed in British uniform when visiting his grandmother, whom he loved, and he enthusiastically raced yachts around the Isle of Wight. But he also felt a deep rivalry, focusing on building up Prussia’s navy to try to compete with Britain’s. He would end up warring with his mother’s family, leading them to change the royal family’s name from Saxe- Coburg- Gotha to Windsor in the First World War, when Britain was fighting Germany.

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 513

What would have happened if Fritz’s cancerous throat had not prematurely ended his life? Germany would have been under the rule of a liberal, compassionate emperor, a leader who wanted to improve the lives of the working class and who especially despised the anti- Semitic movement. “As a modern civilized man, as a Christian and a gentleman, he found it abhorrent,” wrote Vicky; he tried to counter it where he could. His son Wilhelm was the opposite, stirring up and championing anti- Semitism,

CHAPTER 27  The Monarch in a Bonnet > Page 513

Democracy made no sense, Victoria declared, when it only resulted in the reelection of a man like William Gladstone. He became prime minister again in 1892, the third time in a dozen years. It was, she wrote, “a defect in our much- famed Constitution to have to part with an admirable Govt like Ld Salisbury’s for no question of any importance, or any particular reason, merely on account of the number of votes.”

CHAPTER 28  The “Poor Munshi” > Page 532

Gladstone’s death was, very oddly, not noted in the Court Circular. Victoria later told the prime minister, Lord Salisbury, that this had been “entirely an oversight.”

CHAPTER 29  The Diamond Empire > Page 537

Since Victoria ascended to the throne in 1837, the lives of people in her country and around the world had been transformed by the invention of the railway, steamship, telegraph, telephone, sewing machine, electric light, typewriter, camera, and more.

CHAPTER 29  The Diamond Empire > Page 541

A life of sycophancy and lack of questioning meant that her every desire was indulged, and yet she still yearned for what she could not command: love and companionship.

CHAPTER 29  The Diamond Empire > Page 548

But her accounts of what she was told make it clear that Victoria was receiving spin and lies about the war effort, doubtless in part to lift her spirits, as well as to impress upon her the stoicism of her commanders. She was regularly told the men had done their best when they were lying dead in fields; she was told that they didn’t mind the bother of the war and were jolly well glad to be there and fight.

CHAPTER 29  The Diamond Empire > Page 552

fever. By 1902, twenty- eight thousand whites and fourteen thousand black Africans had died in these horrific grounds, almost double the number of British men who died fighting. The queen had no idea of the atrocities occurring at British hands in these camps; the details only emerged, to great controversy, after her death. She would have been mortified.

CHAPTER 30  The End of the Victorian Age: “The Streets Were Indeed a Strange Sight” > Page 562

The world shuddered at the news of the queen’s death. Thousands of telegrams flew to Osborne. In London, actors walked off stages halfway through plays. Traffic stopped. In New York, the stock market closed for a day. In New Guinea, tribes remembered the divine, holy Mother who had loomed over them. In South Africa, Australia, Canada, and India and the farthest reaches of the vast English Empire, people stopped and prayed.

CHAPTER 30  The End of the Victorian Age: “The Streets Were Indeed a Strange Sight” > Page 563

Emily Davison, who became the first martyr of the suffragette movement in 1913 when she was fatally injured under the hooves of the king’s horse at the Derby, wrote a letter to The Times arguing that Victoria demonstrated there should be no such thing as “women’s work”: Victoria had read every document, made her own decisions, and was in no way a “mere figurehead.” Without having ever read the queen’s diary or studied her correspondence, Davison was right.

CHAPTER 30  The End of the Victorian Age: “The Streets Were Indeed a Strange Sight” > Page 567

her faults: her capriciousness, her temper, her domineering way with her children, her sharp eye, her tendency to self- pity, her unchecked selfishness, her conviction that she was always right. But they also knew of her kindness, her loyalty, her humor, her devotion to her work, her faith, her lack of pretension or prejudice, and her resilience.

AUTHOR’S NOTE

CHAPTER 30  The End of the Victorian Age: “The Streets Were Indeed a Strange Sight” > Page 569

But it was not until mid- 2013, after the governor general of Australia, Quentin Bryce, and her secretary, Stephen Brady, lobbied the queen’s secretary on my behalf— vouching for my character— that I was allowed entry. I was thrilled, if discombobulated, by the fact that neither my project nor the nature of my qualifications had changed; it was only the status of my advocate that had pushed open the doors.

Bulldozed by Nikki Savva

As a member of the general public, Nikki Savva comes across as someone with incredible sources within the Liberal Party and ecosystem. So when Bulldozed came out I devoured it. It’s a fascinating read. It’s easier, now, with the benefit of distance, to see the Morrison years as distant and fargone. But this book (which I read fresh, soon after the 2022 election, from memory), captures so much of it -the chaos, the spin, the sense from the press gallery of a leader who prioritised imagery over substance. To her credit, when so many journalists feel a need to ‘both-sides’ an issue, Savva is unequivocal in her conclusions about the Morrison administration. If you’re a political tragic, it’s worth a read.

1 Victory and Damnation

Page 29

Assessing, rightly, that the end could be nigh, that he now had no choice except to delay the election until May, after the budget— although he had sought advice to see if he could extend beyond that by citing Covid— Morrison told colleagues in early 2022: ‘What’s happening here is existential.’

Page 38

Chester told Joyce’s office that Joyce would not be welcome in his electorate during the campaign. He believed Joyce would cost the Nationals votes in every seat south of the Murray. He also told the Nationals’ state director in Victoria, Matt Harris, that Joyce should not visit the state at all during the campaign, and he certainly should not visit his seat of Gippsland.

Page 40

In a desperate, calculated move, he thrust the complex, sensitive issue of transgender athletes and sport into the centre of the election campaign, using a woman with an extensive history of transphobic, offensive material on social media, ignoring the impact it would have on his moderate MPs, including Frydenberg, who were under threat from independents.

Page 40

Deves did something else. She confirmed and exposed the great divide in the Liberal Party between its moderate base and the religious right that Morrison courted and fostered, who contacted MPs and campaign headquarters to insist she be supported. Moderates were also not speaking with one voice— Jason Falinski endorsed her before and during the campaign.

Page 48

With his old finance minister’s hat on, Minchin says: ‘One of the upsides of the campaign was it demonstrated rampant pork- barrelling is not going to save a dying government. ‘You can’t win by throwing money around like Santa Claus.’

Page 49

there were three policies agreed to by Morrison’s Expenditure Review Committee ahead of the budget that might have helped dispel some of that and to set up points of difference with Labor. The first was to expand the cashless debit card; the second, to allow pensioners to work and earn more while retaining their pension; and the third, to allow people to access their superannuation for housing. There was a fourth if you included Robert’s skills package.

Page 50

Among his detractors, and there were plenty, Morrison was regarded as the worst prime minister since Billy McMahon. After news of his secret ministries emerged, they revised that to say he was worse than McMahon. Worse even than Tony Abbott, who lasted a scant two years in the job, whose chief accomplishments were that he destroyed Julia Gillard and then himself, and then, aided and abetted by Dutton and Morrison, destroyed Turnbull.

2 Straight to Hawaii

Page 54

Andrew Carswell, one of his closest advisers, who regrets he did not try to talk his boss out of going to Hawaii, and wishes he had not lied to journalists about where he had gone. With the benefit of hindsight, Morrison’s chief of staff, John Kunkel, says of course it was a bad decision for Morrison to go to Hawaii, but failing to advise him not to go is not at the top of his list of regrets.

Page 55

Word seeped out he was in Honolulu while the bushfires were engulfing the country, thanks to the detective work of Greens MP David Shoebridge, who had followed a tip- off.

Page 56

Hawke said. ‘When you become prime minister, the sacrifices are, you have to give up your life.’

Page 61

That night, after Shoebridge’s tweet appeared, Samantha Maiden posted her first story for The New Daily, quoting Morrison’s office as saying it was ‘wrong’ to say he was in Hawaii. His office also denied it to other journalists, then cited ‘national security’ as a reason for not divulging his whereabouts.

Page 64

‘He should have been back here,’ Andrews said. ‘The optics were awful.’ She agreed that everyone deserved a holiday but added: ‘If you are in the top job, you are giving up your personal life.’

5 Clusterf..k Alert

Page 125

Morrison had tried to recruit a number of celebrity candidates— the former deputy chief medical officer, Dr Nick Coatsworth, and Erin Molan, daughter of Jim, a former TV sports presenter, and now a Sky After Dark host. Both refused.

6 Jenny Says

Page 138

The photo was taken on the phone of an ABC journalist by a public servant said to have a deep interest in matters of national security. He had just been talking to the journalist about the recently departed Labor senator Sam Dastyari, who had been forced to quit over dodgy Chinese connections, when he spotted Porter with the woman. Concerned by what he believed to be inappropriate behaviour by Porter, and to show how easily people can be caught in potentially compromising situations, the public servant grabbed the journalist’s smartphone and took a photo.

7 I Am the Prime Minister (and you are a fuckwit)

Page 154

Repeated attempts were made by the New South Wales state director, Chris Stone, directly to Morrison or to his office, to appoint someone other than Hawke to sit on the vetting body, the Nominations Review Committee. Previously, Morrison had allowed Paul Fletcher to act on his behalf. Morrison refused to nominate someone other than Hawke. Party rules decree that all four members of the NRC or their representatives must attend— there has to be a full complement, not just a simple quorum— which include the prime minister or his delegate. It was always open to Morrison to allow someone else to attend on his behalf if Hawke was indeed too busy.

Page 158

He wore everyone down, and won the internal battles. Then he lost the war.

8 Listen to the Voices of the Women

Page 176

McGowan organised another Zoom meeting in August 2022 called ‘Next Steps’. There were 450 people who registered, from 103 electorates around the country. The enthusiasm was unabated. All six new independents took part, and Holmes à Court also dialled in.

10 Rebels with Causes

Page 196

Bragg’s threat was known at the time, and on its own was enough to kill the bill; however, not so well known is that three other Coalition senators were prepared to cross the floor with him. They were Perin Davey, who was voted in as deputy National Party leader after the election; Andrew McLachlan, a Liberal from South Australia; and Susan McDonald, from the Liberal National Party of Queensland.

Page 197

Morrison would have known that the Senate vote would have been as humiliating as the one in the House of Representatives. And yet Morrison had stubbornly wanted to keep going, to put the bill up in the Senate in order to overturn the changes made in the House. He was forced to confront reality— that he would have faced further embarrassment— and eventually withdrew the bill. It was a rare thing.

Page 198

On 1 December, with the approval of the prime minister’s office, Sharma, Fiona Martin, Angie Bell, and Katie Allen put out a press release welcoming ‘proposed amendments to the Sex Discrimination Act 1984 that will remove the right of religious schools to discriminate against students on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity.

Page 199

Once the implications of what he had done were explained to Morrison, he is said to have responded by saying: ‘I didn’t mean that, that’s not what I had in mind.’ One MP paraphrased his excuse thus: ‘He stuffed up, but couldn’t bring himself to say it.’ Everyone felt dudded. The moderates were furious; the conservatives were incredulous.

Page 203

Throughout the night and morning, while the leadership and staff were exerting pressure to stop the backbenchers crossing the floor, the backbenchers were talking to one another, trying to stay strong. Archer spoke to Martin inside the chamber and in the annex. It was around 3.00 or 4.00 am. Archer said that Martin was stressed, in pieces, but holding firm. Martin kept saying to her: ‘I have to protect kids. I have to do this.’ Martin felt it was not only morally and ethically right to oppose the bill, but that her professional reputation was at stake.

Page 204

At 8.30 am, at the usual leadership meeting with Morrison, Birmingham told the prime minister that the bill would not make it through the Senate with the House’s amendment removed, because Coalition senators would not support it. Morrison persisted for a while, and then realised around mid- morning that he had been defeated.

12 Trans-gressions

Page 230

It was quintessential Morrison. Refuse to admit a mistake, stick with it, and turn it into an even bigger one. Allow a problem to become a crisis before mishandling it.

Page 231

However, she did confirm that Morrison had contacted her. ‘I heard directly from the prime minister to encourage me to keep going,’ she said.

Page 232

Usually in campaigns, candidates have to clear each and every media interview in advance with campaign headquarters. Deves did not clear any of hers, including the most controversial one with Sky in the dying days of the campaign, when she retracted her apology. The first that the campaign team in New South Wales knew of any of her interviews was when they appeared.

Page 234

If re- elected, we will pursue passage of the Religious Discrimination Bill as stand- alone legislation in the next Parliament and will not accept any attempts to make changes to other laws that undermine protections for religious institutions.

Page 235

According to one well- connected Liberal, Deves’ Sky interview recanting her apology was set up deliberately to revive the issue with the prime minister, knowing he would be asked about it at his press conference the next morning. Which he was.

Page 239

The ACL campaigned against Liberals in key seats, including Reid and Bass. As well as fielding complaints from moderate Liberals, campaign headquarters was getting calls from branch members saying that Morrison should go in harder on the transgender issues.

13 The Best of Days, the Worst of Days

Page 276

However, in the run- up to the 2022 budget and the election campaign, the Expenditure Review Committee of cabinet ticked off on the super- for- housing idea. It was decided not to include it in the budget, but to wait until a few weeks later to announce it.

Page 276

The other two options ticked off by the ERC were an expansion of the cashless debit card, and allowing pensioners to earn more while still keeping their pension.

14 JoshKeeper

Page 290

In 2018, Holmes à Court had written an article criticising the Coalition’s energy policies, which Frydenberg as energy minister was running. A day later, Holmes à Court got a message from Kooyong 200, Frydenberg’s fabulously successful fundraising vehicle, saying that his membership was being declined, and that he would be refunded the fees plus a four- figure donation he had made. When Holmes à Court tackled Frydenberg about this subsequently, Frydenberg said that Kooyong 200 was only for ‘unconditional supporters’. Holmes à Court’s money was refunded in April 2018.

Page 290

In March 2019, in the run- up to the election, Holmes à Court was invited by a friend to accompany her to a meet- and- greet with Frydenberg at a local hotel. Frydenberg was working the room. He got to them, it was all hail- fellow- well- met, there was no sign of tension or aggro, and Frydenberg moved on to the next group. But Frydenberg saw their presence as a deliberately provocative act, given that Holmes à Court was supporting Yates. Soon after Frydenberg had moved away from them, Holmes à Court and his friend were approached by the woman hosting the event, and were asked to leave. When they asked why, the woman said it was because Frydenberg had asked that they be told to leave. They did. That night, Holmes à Court pretty much conceived Climate 200, the fundraising vehicle that in 2022 raised $ 13 million, helped win six seats from the Liberals, gutted the party, and thwarted Frydenberg’s political career.

Page 297

While Cathy McGowan is right to say that you don’t have to have the balance of power to have influence, or even to be seen to have influence, Albanese’s challenge is to ensure that the crossbench remains relevant and therefore a continuing threat to the Liberals— but, as with the Greens, not too powerful. He needs to be seen to be consultative, conciliatory, and all the while in control.

15 Google It, Mate

Page 300

The planning and activity that went into delivering three seats in the House of Representatives, making it four in the lower house, including Bandt’s, and another three senators, taking the party’s representation in the upper house to 12, was meticulous and slightly mindboggling. It was a mixture of old- style politics with a clever use of social media, including TikTok and Instagram, featuring characters from The Simpsons, The Lion King, and a giant green Shrek straddling Parliament House.

16 Team Albanese

Page 310

The next day, Clare was at his office at 6.00 am. The usual conference call between the leadership group- plus and campaign headquarters was at 6.15 to go through the news of the day and to work out responses. If the government had announced a policy or briefed one to the papers, they would have sorted Labor’s position by 6.30 so that he or one of the shadow ministers could announce it on breakfast TV. Usually, to close off debate, they would adopt the government’s policy.

Page 311

It didn’t help that Payne was participating, even if in a low- key way, in the election campaign. She had appeared with Morrison in Parramatta, and word had filtered out that she had a fundraiser scheduled precisely when Seselja was sent to the Solomons. Her office denied that, saying she had a ‘business dinner’.

Page 312

Joyce was to Liberal voters what Roundup was to weeds, to which many serving and former Nationals would reply: ‘Not our problem. It’s not our job to win Liberals’ seats for them.’

Page 314

After the 2019 election loss, Wong had had enough. She had decided to quit politics altogether. Then Albanese decided he would run for the leadership. She changed her mind. She came out in support of him, then she had to stay to help him win the leadership, and then win government. ‘I had loyalty to him, and he had always backed me,’ she said.

Page 318

If members of the media wanted to know what Labor would do, he would say: ‘We are not the government.’

Page 320

There was barely a peep when Andrew Charlton was parachuted into Parramatta— except from Liberals who grunted about a wealthy top- of- towner shifting from Bellevue Hill to western Sydney. Charlton was an exceptional candidate, a self- made millionaire with economic expertise— again, the kind of candidate that the Liberals would at one time have killed to recruit. Unless his name was Turnbull.

17 Rocking Boats

Page 332

A senior staffer who was with Morrison that day did not dispute later that the prime minister had liaised with campaign headquarters for the text message to be dispatched. He described it as a ‘quite normal and reasonable’ thing to do in a campaign, especially as the matter was already public.

18 Over and Out

Page 350

Morrison delayed submitting his resignation to the governor- general, and there was concern that the swearing- in would have to be delayed. Fearing that Albanese’s departure for Tokyo would be delayed, Government House had to give Morrison a hurry- up.

19 The Best of Friends

Page 374

A few disillusioned small- l Liberals believe the time has come for the party to be honest and to start calling itself the Conservative Party, with a capital C. Morrison’s solution for the once- broad church that was the Liberal Party was a schism. He told people after the election that the Liberals and Nationals should unite Australia- wide along the lines of the Liberal National Party of Queensland, to create a nationwide conservative party. Then the moderates could form a separate party to appeal to electors in all the old heartland seats. Under this Morrison scenario, they could both then come together to form a Coalition and live together happily ever after. Or not.

Acknowledgements

Page 391

He was the worst prime minister I have covered, and I have been writing about all of them since Gough Whitlam. He simply wasn’t up to the job.

The Library: A Fragile History by Andrew Pettegree and Arthur der Weduwen

The Library: A Fragile History is a beautiful piece. It’s an in-depth, thoughtful history of libraries, in the broadest sense. And as someone who perhaps wasn’t expecting too much when I started it, it was fascinating to see how what we take for granted as a ‘library’ in our current usage (an older, slightly boring place that’s quieter, and publicly funded) is just one iteration in a long lineage that’s shifted significantly over time. Unsurprisingly, what constituted a library (and who had access) was bound up with questions of power and authority in a society, and what reading was for (entertainment? Education? Empowerment?), and who had access to it.

From early examples (the Library of Ashurbanipal, Alexandria), through medieval monasteries, the growing print collections as the printing press revolutionised things, through to the philanthropy that contributed to modern institutions, it’s a surprisingly fascinating read. Granted, not everyone would think a history of the Library is worth it – but if you find the idea interesting, this book absolutely lives up to that premise – it’s well worth it.

Quotes

Part 1 – Inception and Survival

1. A Confusion of Scrolls > Page 21

We will never really know how many texts were accumulated by this library: scholars have spoken of 200,000 or even half a million scrolls. Whatever figure we choose, this was a library of a size that would never again be achieved until the nineteenth century. A collection of this magnitude necessarily required careful organisation. Scrolls were stored in recessed alcoves, where they could be stacked in organised groups. The sheer size of the Alexandrian library demanded far more systematic cataloguing, with books split between many different chambers. The texts were stored alphabetically, though presumably also organised by genre, the leading principle of classification in every institutional library thereafter.

1. A Confusion of Scrolls > Page 23

By far the most prominent and visible libraries in Rome were those established by the emperors, beginning with Augustus. This built on a scheme first conceived by Julius Caesar, thwarted by his assassination, to include libraries in his plan for ‘adorning and building up’ the city of Rome, a phrase which hints at the true purpose of these collections.

1. A Confusion of Scrolls > Page 24

According to the waspish Lucian of Samosata, in the second century many politicians acquired a library purely to win the favour of Marcus Aurelius, a notably bookish emperor.

1. A Confusion of Scrolls > Page 26

The flexibility of the compilation, the ability to create bespoke texts from segments of other works, was one of the key features distinguishing the manuscript book world from the age of print, where the order and nature of texts was established before they came into the hands of the purchaser.

2. Sanctuary > Page 35

the fall of the Roman Empire disrupted significantly the supply of papyrus throughout the Mediterranean world; parchment became the standard replacement. As the material of the book changed, so did the form. The codex, sheets or tablets laid on top of one another and sewn or stitched together at one edge, was also an older medium. Codices were available in ancient Rome but used almost exclusively as notebooks or as exercise boards in schools. At some time in the third century, codices began to replace scrolls as the normative way to preserve a body of text; it was clear that this transformation was tied up with the Christian movement, whose early texts were almost universally produced as codices. By the sixth century, the codex was triumphant and remained the standard form of the book until the present day.

2. Sanctuary > Page 46

the chained library proved remarkably enduring in cathedral, church and college collections. Fresh chains were still being purchased in some libraries as late as the middle of the eighteenth century. Merton College, Oxford, did not unchain its books until 1792.

3. Little Monkeys and Letters of Gold > Page 53

The mass production of manuscript books in urban scriptoria did not lead to a sea of indistinguishable products. On the contrary, it was in the century before printing that books attained their greatest status as objects of aesthetic brilliance, customised to the wishes of the owner. Beautiful books, lavishly rubricated with vermilion, lapis lazuli and verdigris, decorated with gold leaf and bound in bejewelled covers, had been a mainstay of the libraries of European monasteries and courts since the age of Charlemagne. Yet it was in the workshops of Paris, Bruges and Florence that the art of bookmaking reached its apogee, driven by specialisation, the division of labour and the deep pockets of the nobility. Some workshops employed illuminators who were masters of their art, famous painters who could charge exorbitant fees. This was a brief age in which books were an expression of the highest form of visual art, and where the price of a book might match or even outstrip the value of other possessions in the home.

3. Little Monkeys and Letters of Gold > Page 56

Creating a courtly library was a public act; not necessarily because the books were on permanent display or for public use, but because the acts involved in creating books, composition, copying, illumination and presentation, all took place under the patronage of the ruler and their family.

3. Little Monkeys and Letters of Gold > Page 71

That Buddhist monasteries could amass extraordinary collections was confirmed in the early twentieth century, when a ‘library cave’ was discovered in Dunhuang, western China, as part of a vast underground monastic complex. Sealed since the eleventh century, the cave held around 40,000 manuscripts, most of them Buddhist texts, but also a rich variety of works in other genres, from Greek classical philology to medicine, revealing the scholarship and intellectual curiosity of this monastic community strategically located at a crucial junction of the Silk Road.

Part 2 – The Crisis of Print

4. The Infernal Press > Page 77

The invention of printing also upset the traditional rhythms of trade in the book world. A scribe would ordinarily have a customer in mind when producing a book; indeed, most scribes would have been commissioned directly by a client. When the book was finished, the scribe could be paid and the transaction was concluded. The printer, although he may have had a few customers in mind, had to speculate how many buyers might be found for 300, 500 or 1,000 copies, and where those buyers might be.

4. The Infernal Press > Page 78

Johann Luschner, invited to take up printing in the Benedictine monastery at Montserrat in Catalonia, produced 190,000 indulgence certificates on behalf of his patrons.

5. Coming of Age > Page 92

Abecedarium, an alphabetical list of the authors and titles of books in his collection.

5. Coming of Age > Page 93

In addition to the Abecedarium, Colon found time for a separate cataloguing enterprise, offering a detailed note on each of his purchases, including where it was printed, where he had bought it and how much he paid. This detailed record allows us a view of the workings of the international book market of unprecedented subtlety.

5. Coming of Age > Page 98

Colon was ensuring that his primary aim should be accomplished, that the library should encompass ‘all books, in all languages, and on all subjects, which can be found within Christendom and without’. 11 This was very radical: well into the eighteenth century, libraries, personal and institutional, would continue to privilege books in Latin and the other scholarly languages. Some actually banned books in the common tongue: most books in the local language were destined for reading and disposal, rather than collection. Here, especially, Colon was a man ahead of his time.

5. Coming of Age > Page 100

This, as it turned out, would be an everyday story of library history. One man’s passion project would be nothing but a burden to those to whom the responsibility of curation was passed on. At least in the age of print, no failure was ever final. Libraries abandoned or dispersed, burned down or looted, could be regenerated with astonishing speed. That was the miracle of print: the ever- accumulating mountain of books was available, sometimes at knockdown prices, for anyone with the energy and determination to build libraries. For the moment this would be largely private citizens rather than institutional collections. For the next two hundred years, the fate of the library would lie in the hands of generations of scholars, civil servants, lawyers, physicians and merchants, who collected books for work, and increasingly for pleasure. This was the age of the professionals; and it was they who would shape the future of the library.

6. Reformations > Page 102

The Reformation gradually changed the nature of the book: it became cheaper, shorter and less scholarly. This transformation encouraged many people who were not habitual buyers of books to build their own collections. Once individuals became used to visiting bookshops and reading pamphlets, they would often return for more, and soon they too had small libraries, stacked with as many German texts as traditional Latin tomes.

6. Reformations > Page 105

The insurgents saw the opportunity to destroy institutions whose ruthlessness as landlords accorded so poorly with the life of contemplative prayer to which monks had ostensibly devoted themselves. Their libraries often contained the monasteries’ collections of charters and deeds that gave proof of their rights to property and feudal service. At Weisenburg, the peasants celebrated by burning a wagon of archival papers at the market square, whereas those at Reinhardsbrunn ensured that all fragments were consumed by the flames in a bonfire held in the cloister’s court. In Bamberg, when the peasants attacked the episcopal palace, ‘they tore up books, registers and letters, especially those of the fiscal office [along with] many judicial acts and registers’. 7 The deliberate destruction of archival documents helps explain why the peasant bands also targeted the much smaller personal libraries of noblemen, or abbots and bishops, which contained many legal papers. In Bamberg alone, twenty- six noble families made claims for damages to their libraries.

6. Reformations > Page 108

The dissolution of the monasteries instigated the largest transfer of land in England since the Norman Conquest of 1066. This was a massive undertaking, spearheaded by royal commissioners who toured the monastic houses and the administrators who kept the books at the Court of Augmentations, the financial institution founded to administer all dissolved property.

6. Reformations > Page 115

Bookshops were raided and stock inspected, especially for books that clearly revealed their origins in dangerous Protestant printing centres like Wittenberg. To circumvent this, printers took to falsifying the place of publication on the title pages of their books, or anonymising them altogether. Over time, the hardening of religious fault lines ensured that books from suspect printing centres would be anathema in other markets.

Part 3 – The New Collectors

7. The Professionals > Page 130

Booksellers had initially not welcomed the new book auctions, until they realised how much opportunity it provided for them to make money. Booksellers assessed collections, compiled the catalogues and sold them in their shops, taking 5– 15 per cent commission on sales. They even, less creditably, infiltrated some of their own slow- moving stock into the sale, where it could be passed off as part of the distinguished library going under the hammer. This process was widely deplored, frequently prohibited, but thought to be ubiquitous.

7. The Professionals > Page 141

Fire, neglect, assault by pirates, ungrateful heirs, careless nephews: the transition of a library from working tool to intellectual monument was strewn with so many pitfalls that it is no wonder that few collections survived to memorialise a stratum of collecting that was, at the time, essential to the history of the library.

8. Idle Books and Riff Raff > Page 145

Oxford’s blanket ban on lending was maintained after Bodley’s death and upheld even in the face of requests to borrow books from both King Charles I and the Lord Protector, Oliver Cromwell. Bodley also insisted that the Bodleian Library should welcome readers, and not only those from Oxford. This was perhaps the most significant aspect of Bodley’s vision. Thus far, university or college libraries had largely been for the use only of the scholars employed at that institution. Some distinguished visitors might be granted access, but always by invitation only. Bodley inverted this rule, and although he cautioned against letting new undergraduate students into the library, visiting scholars were welcome to use the library’s resources.

8. Idle Books and Riff Raff > Page 147

A more lasting principle that Bodley introduced was a rule of silence– perhaps the first modern instance of this, and very different from the noisy conviviality of the Renaissance court libraries. By 1711 the rule of silence had been adopted more generally, most fervently in Amsterdam, where the user of the library was greeted by this severe warning in verse: You learned sir, who enter among books, don’t slam the door with your tumultuous hand; nor let your rowdy foot create a bang, a nuisance to the Muse. Then, if you see someone seated within, greet him by bowing, and with a silent nod: nor waffle gossip: here it’s the dead who speak to them who work. 7

8. Idle Books and Riff Raff > Page 147

The strict embargo on kindling ‘any fire or flame’ (still recited aloud by new readers to this day), made work conditions gruelling in winter, and probably contributed to the deaths of some of the more determined readers; but it did save the Bodleian from destruction by fire, a fate common to many libraries in northern Europe (and later Harvard, in North America).

8. Idle Books and Riff Raff > Page 147

Thomas Bodley was only the first of many powerful personalities associated with the library: his first librarian, the theologian Thomas James, was almost as influential. James had taken on the assignment as Bodley’s librarian in order to conduct his own research on patristic texts, but he seriously underestimated Bodley’s ambition, as much as the incessant demands with which he tormented his librarian. 9 The large number of visitors and the endless flow of new books left James little time for his own work. He was also responsible for the first comprehensive catalogues of the collection, an aspect of the librarian’s work in which he excelled. The two catalogues that he produced appeared in print in 1605 and 1620. Although they were not the first printed catalogues of library collections in Europe, those of the Bodleian would resonate through the European book world, influencing the contents of libraries throughout the continent for the next two centuries.

9. Mission Fields > Page 166

A well- ordered library also required a capable librarian, and here Loyola was rather ahead of his time. In many universities, the position of librarian was regarded as a sinecure, an acceptable salaried position to enjoy while one waited for something better. Jesuit librarians, in contrast, were kept busy ordering and cataloguing, managing loans and creating bibliographical registers: it was an important and respected vocation.

9. Mission Fields > Page 177

Henry Garnet, the English Jesuit Superior, was among those executed in 1606 in the wake of the failed attempt to blow up the king and the Houses of Parliament. Despite this, in the course of the seventeenth century the Jesuit mission in England built a most remarkable network of clandestine libraries. The library at Cwm in Herefordshire held 336 volumes, drawn from the major centres of European Catholic printing. The library at Holbeck Woodhouse in Nottinghamshire was twice as large. 36 Both were confiscated in the wave of anti- Catholic hysteria at the time of the alleged Popish Plot to kill King Charles II in 1678, although presumably the existence of both had been known to the authorities well before this.

Part 4 – Between Public and Private

10. Grand Designs > Page 181

Kirkwood was unusual, however, in that his energies went not into building his own private place of solace, but a grand plan for bringing enlightenment and learning to all parts of his native Scotland by planting a public library in every parish.

10. Grand Designs > Page 184

One community that did manage to develop a popular town library was the large, rich and fiercely independent port city of Hamburg. Here the municipal library flourished, thanks to relatively generous conditions of access. From 1651 onwards, it was open for four hours each day, and fifty years later it even allowed citizens of the city to borrow books. The collection grew from 25,000 volumes in 1704 to 100,000 volumes by the end of the eighteenth century.

10. Grand Designs > Page 186

The desperate librarian at one point tried to cement up the door of the library, but he found that this was no serious obstacle to soldiers on a quest for the gilded clasps that adorned the bindings in the collection.

10. Grand Designs > Page 191

It seems that many library builders prioritised their own desire– to leave a monumental presence in their community– over careful consideration of the future users of their bequest. Collectors always find it difficult to conceive that what they have curated, at great expense and effort, may hold little value to others.

11. Cardinal Errors > Page 201

Shortly before his death, Cardinal Richelieu had recalled from Italy a fellow Frenchman, Gabriel Naudé, to organise and expand his book collection. Naudé was a man very much in demand, the living epitome of the new professional librarian, employed by the great to establish or build a library.

11. Cardinal Errors > Page 218

In the most ambitious architectural schemes, no expense was too much to achieve the desired effect: at Seitenstetten, all books in the library were rebound in white leather to harmonise with the new marble. The process took thirty years. 31

12. The Antiquarians > Page 224

In 1622, Sixtinus had broken into the house of Janus Gruter, a distinguished humanist scholar and professor at Heidelberg. Gruter’s library was his pride and joy, as well as his chief source of fame, but he had been forced to flee town before the anticipated onslaught of Habsburg troops.

12. The Antiquarians > Page 239

Bibliomania, frantic competitive bidding for the best and rarest copies of early printed books, left a lasting impression on the most opulent eighteenth and nineteenth- century personal libraries. It was denounced as a moral disease, a siren call to young aristocrats who might squander the family’s estate on fifteenth- century books that they could not even read. The seemingly mindless purchase of old books was deemed the very height of ostentatious consumerism. Bibliomania peaked in the infamous Roxburghe auction of 1812, which saw some books from the library of the Duke of Roxburghe sell for exorbitant prices. The duke’s copy of the editio princeps of Boccaccio’s Decameron of 1471 was sold for £ 2,260, a lifetime’s wages for a skilled tradesman. The press was indignant: that noblemen spent money on hunting and gambling was accepted fact, but books! In comparison, when the statesman Charles James Fox sold two of his racehorses for £ 2,330 each, this passed without a murmur. 43 The prices paid at the Roxburghe auction proved to be the tipping point. The value of antiquarian books had become absurdly inflated and would fall back significantly over the next half- century.

12. The Antiquarians > Page 240

A bookbroker and bibliographer to the rich, Dibdin provided some of the intellectual firepower to share the activities of bibliophiles and their passions with a broader public. He published an extensive guide to rare classical editions, as well as two discourses on bibliography, the Bibliomania: or Book- Madness (1809) and the Bibliographical Decameron (1821). These lavishly produced publications further enhanced the air of eccentricity surrounding the Roxburghe Club, but Dibdin can also be credited for stoking more general interest in the value of old books.

Part 5 – Fictions

13. Orderly Minds > Page 245

They were bound together by enquiring minds and a restless desire for self- improvement, and this was especially true of the man who was the driving force behind their common endeavour, Benjamin Franklin. 1 Franklin suggested they should pool their books into a single collection, so they would be freely available to all. By 1731, Franklin was prepared to go a step further and open this society to a larger group of Philadelphia citizens: each would pay a joining fee and annual subscription to allow the creation of a library for their mutual use. Thus was born the Library Company of Philadelphia, the world’s first subscription library. Unlike many such ventures, the Library Company flourishes to this day.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 246

The new reading classes were largely shut out of the comfortable middle- class sociability of the subscription libraries. They relied instead on a new tier of commercial circulating libraries that served up fiction and escapist literature for readers to while away their precious hours of leisure away from the loom or the factory floor. These new, more democratic, circulating libraries were initially run by booksellers and functioned as an adjunct to their regular business.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 246

It was only with the arrival of the circulating libraries that the reading public could fully indulge their taste for the books they read for leisure. This preference was overwhelmingly for fiction: novels, detective stories and romance, with a few true- life travel adventures thrown in. 2

13. Orderly Minds > Page 250

To many, the main attraction of membership of social libraries was their provision of congenial space in which to read newspapers and meet other of the town’s leading citizens. This easy sociability would be disrupted by the furious political contention of the Jacksonian era, when, for instance, the Democratic faction in Portsmouth, New Hampshire, opened their own reading room in competition to the Portsmouth Athenaeum. 8 The presence of more than one social library in many New England towns by 1850 facilitated this sort of partisan separation.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 251

That subscription libraries were rather slower to take off in England may partly be attributed to a rich hinterland of alternative institutions. Coffee houses, which became all the rage in the early eighteenth century, offered a wide range of newspapers but some also accumulated substantial libraries. These consisted largely of pamphlets and verse satires on contemporary political issues, precisely the sort of reading material that would appeal to the news- savvy clientele that gathered in the London coffee houses clustered around the Inns of Court or the City. They were open to regular users for a subscription as little as one shilling, but they could also be available to drop- in customers. This James Boswell experienced to his delight when, disappointed in his hope of finding one of his own publications at his publisher’s, he was directed round to the Chapter Coffee House where he located it with ease.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 251

These book clubs have largely disappeared from the library story, but there seem to have been many hundreds if not thousands of them in Georgian England. 12 The book clubs flourished especially in smaller towns where local readers felt starved of the intellectual intercourse they imagined would be theirs in large cities or the county town. Book clubs generally consisted of between six and twelve friends, who met either in each other’s homes or in a local tavern. The books purchased with the subscription funds were disposed of at the end of the year: there was no intention to build a permanent collection. The book clubs were also far more welcoming to female participants than the coffee houses.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 254

Subscription libraries in England went through a difficult period at the end of the eighteenth century, and again during the radical agitation at the end of the Napoleonic Wars. Fear that the contagion of radicalism might spread to England from France cast membership of private associations under suspicion, and this seems also to have embraced book clubs and libraries. Many prudently resigned their membership, though numbers revived in the 1820s. However, libraries were not made the object of any special measures, and the rigorous scrutiny of the book selection sub- committee was generally thought sufficient proof against revolutionary sentiment.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 263

the Stationers’ Company, the association of London publishers who had acted as the industry’s regulatory body in the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries,

13. Orderly Minds > Page 265

The years between 1780 and 1830 had seen a steady increase in the price of new fiction, exacerbated by the pressure on the industry caused by the French Revolutionary Wars, and the post- war depression. The extraordinary popularity of the historical fiction of Sir Walter Scott allowed prices to reach new heights. New novels by Scott came to the market at a guinea and a half (31s 6d), a price that placed them outside the range of all but the wealthiest customers. Furnishing these new works to customers unwilling to wait a year for a 6- shilling reprint became the staple of the circulating libraries, which by the 1840s could charge 4 to 6 guineas for an annual subscription. Mudie boldly joined this market offering an annual subscription of only one guinea, which allowed him to gather new subscribers very rapidly. In 1864, Mudie’s became a public company, financing further growth. By this point Mudie was in the position to make his own terms with publishers, insisting that he would only take novels in the traditional three- volume format, for which the cover price remained 31s 6d, even for authors far less lustrous than Sir Walter Scott. This was an arrangement that brought benefits to all parties. Readers got for their guinea- a- year as many books as they could read for less than the price of one new novel, and publishers secured a guaranteed sale, since Mudie would take the bulk of the first edition.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 266

In effect, Mudie had secured himself a national monopoly on the publication of new fiction. What he chose not to take would not be published.

13. Orderly Minds > Page 266

Mudie’s insistence on the three- volume format was undoubtedly responsible for the verbosity of many nineteenth- century novels, as authors went to extraordinary efforts to pad their texts to the required length. While a seasoned professional like Anthony Trollope mastered the required skill, writing his daily quota of words before work, many struggled to maintain inspiration and dramatic tension for the required 200,000 words, 66,000 words per volume. If we wonder why so many nineteenth- century novels lose themselves in a convoluted (though chaste) love story between two marginal characters in the novel’s middle passage, we should blame Charles Edward Mudie: this was the problem of the difficult second volume.

14. Building Empires > Page 286

The alphabetical catalogue was first proposed in 1834, when it was thought that the project would take five or six years to complete. By 1880, a year after Panizzi’s death, it was still unfinished, with 160,000 entries requiring revision. Printing nevertheless went forward, and in 1905, there was a complete catalogue, of 397 parts and 44 supplements with some 4.5 million entries and cross- references. 53 For some readers, this came far too late, not least those who had abandoned the library to establish their own subscription library, the London Library, where they could be assured of more satisfactory provision.

14. Building Empires > Page 286

the Russian minister of education ordered him to produce an alphabetical catalogue. 54 For ten years, the staff of the library laboured away, until the minister was replaced and the whole venture was quietly dropped.

14. Building Empires > Page 286

the Bavarian theologian Alois Pichler (1833– 74), who was employed as extraordinary librarian at the imperial library in St Petersburg. 55 Between August 1869 and March 1871, Pichler removed some 4,500 books and manuscripts from the library. His method, as suspicious as it was efficient, was to hide them in his bulky overcoat, which he never removed. When caught, and placed on trial, he admitted that a scholar in Munich had shown him how to construct a cloth sack to attach to the inside of his coat.

14. Building Empires > Page 287

When it moved to Washington DC in 1800, Congress acquired a library of some 3,000 volumes, mostly works on jurisprudence and politics, to serve congressmen in their work. This library was torched by British troops in 1814, while its replacement, which included Thomas Jefferson’s personal collection, was partially destroyed in 1851 by fire. These setbacks were exacerbated by the insistence that the library, because it served Congress, must remain bipartisan, and therefore could not build up a comprehensive selection of books and periodicals, including the great number devoted to the debate on slavery.

15. Reading on the Job > Page 306

The consequences of this passion for recreation were laid bare to leaders of the socialist movement in 1918, when the collapse of the German monarchy offered the opportunity to build a socialist state. Yet the workers did not grasp this. According to one jaded intellectual, ‘The overwhelming majority of the German workers could not imagine life clearly in a socialist state, in spite of the fifty years’ existence of German Social Democracy’; and, one might add, the existence of fifty years of workers’ libraries.

15. Reading on the Job > Page 312

Towns grew rapidly, and without much regard for planning. The town elites soon identified a library as a necessary civilising influence. The problem of social control featured frequently in correspondence with James Bertram, Carnegie’s secretary, and by now the driving force behind the library plan: ‘the fact that this is a railroad center… brings to the city a large number of unmarried men who desire good books to read and a place in which to read them’. 30 None of these letters promoted the library as an intellectual force: a Carnegie library was a symbol of the community’s coming of age.

15. Reading on the Job > Page 315

almost every generation of library development had fought to exclude the pernicious instruments of light entertainment likely to turn heads and addle brains: Sir Thomas Bodley’s ‘idle books and riffe raffes’. It was not that critics could present tangible evidence of fiction’s noxious impact, although some tried. In 1840, the New York Lyceum circulated a pamphlet claiming that the reading of novels was ‘one of the standing causes of insanity’ citing ‘reports of some French hospitals for lunatics’. 33 This, it must be said, was a weak source of authority, particularly when used, as here, as part of an advertising campaign for a library that would exclude all works of fiction ‘except those of a religious or moral character’.

15. Reading on the Job > Page 318

At the outbreak of the First World War, 85 per cent of the staff employed in American libraries were women, whereas in England the proportions were exactly reversed. It is certainly true that many women were employed in subordinate positions (and were paid less than men), but not always: the public library in Los Angeles was presided over by a remarkable sequence of seven female librarians between 1880 and 1905. When the last of these, Mary Letitia Jones, the first librarian of Los Angeles to have graduated from library school, was ordered to resign to make way for a man, she refused. Her case brought national support and a demonstration by the women of Los Angeles. The impasse was broken only when Jones left to become librarian at Bryn Mawr College in Pennsylvania.

Part 6 – The War on Books

16. Surviving the Twentieth Century > Page 323

Pro- German titles were discreetly withdrawn from circulation, as a general assault unfolded on German language, literature and even foodstuffs: sauerkraut became liberty cabbage, Frankfurters, liberty sausage.

16. Surviving the Twentieth Century > Page 326

Whereas at the beginning of the wars, patrons sought out works of history, by 1943 German librarians were noting an overwhelming demand for light fiction, ‘books with cheerful content’. As the bombs rained down, books were a means of escape from current woes, a desperate means to banish care, if only for a brief interval before being forced once again to confront reality. The heightened emotions of war brought peaks of elation, triumph, horror and catastrophe.

16. Surviving the Twentieth Century > Page 329

In 1914, the Germans had blamed a Belgian sniper for provoking the artillery barrage that destroyed the library: ninety- three prominent German scientists, artists and intellectuals were cajoled into signing a letter supporting this and endorsing Germany’s right of reprisal.

17. Wrestling with Modernity > Page 351

From the first days of radio and then cinema these were real competitors, not just for much- valued leisure time, but also for possession of the imaginative world once shaped primarily by print. This, rather than the fascination for new technology that characterised Europe and North America throughout this century, was probably the most potent challenge to the supremacy of the book and thus to the long- term viability of the library. Treasured library books could populate the waking mind, and dreams, with distant worlds and adventures. But with radio you could hear the voices, and at the movies you could see King Kong’s massive bulk. These were multimedia experiences. The addition of a skilful soundtrack trained the regular radio listener or moviegoer to a whole range of emotional responses; a vastly more appealing audioscape than the noise of squabbling siblings jolting you back from Mandalay when curled up for evening reading.

18. Libraries, Books and Politics > Page 383

If these proud Victorians patriarchs thought they had earned the lasting gratitude of the citizens of Chicago, they had reckoned without Big Bill Thompson. A vehement critic of prohibition and proud friend of the gangster Al Capone, Big Bill blazed an eccentric trail through Chicago politics as the city’s mayor. Forced out of office once, in 1927 Big Bill planned his comeback with a novel rallying cry. Should the King of England visit Chicago, he pledged, Big Bill would punch him on the nose. The inoffensive George V had no plans to visit the United States, so the threat was somewhat moot, but the pledge struck a sufficient chord with Chicago’s electorate and Big Bill returned triumphant to City Hall. 5 King George’s nose remained intact, but Mayor Thompson’s one- sided feud was not over. He now announced that the city library must be purged of pro- British literature. Since the mayor was simultaneously engaged on hounding out of office the supervisor of schools, this task was delegated to one of his appointees, Urbine ‘Sport’ Herrmann. The director of the public library, Carl Roden, offered only tepid resistance. Noting that identifying all books expressing anti- American sentiment would be a huge task, he offered instead to remove them from general circulation to the safety of the library’s closed reserve. In the event, the books were saved by Herrmann’s indolence. Having checked out four books flagged up by the Patriots League, he found the task of locating the offensive passages beyond his capacities, and tamely returned them the following day.

18. Libraries, Books and Politics > Page 384

This and subsequent attempts to purge the Chicago library collection emphasised the need for a more robust statement of the library’s commitment to free speech. 6 The result was a terse document, drafted by the American Library Association, rather sententiously titled the Library Bill of Rights, affirming first and foremost the librarian’s inalienable right to choose what books should enter the collection. Published in 1939, as storm clouds gathered over Europe, and revised frequently since, it offered a fragile defence for the idea that libraries should be the sanctuary for literature representing all strands of opinion.

18. Libraries, Books and Politics > Page 398

Despite a sustained effort to offer universal provision, by the 1970s there was a clear sense that libraries were losing their way. Prime Minister Gough Whitlam asked a commission of enquiry, headed by the respected librarian Allan Horton, to come up with solutions, which he did in the endearingly titled report, ‘Libraries are great mate!’ But they could be greater.

Postscript: Reading Without Books

18. Libraries, Books and Politics > Page 403

Most of all, the Bibliotheca Alexandrina serves as a symbol: of a worldwide commitment to the value of education as a means of empowerment, and the place of information at its heart. It also acts as a powerful manifestation of the place of the global south in the future history and development of the library.

18. Libraries, Books and Politics > Page 406

Sometimes books are stolen, particularly from the larger collections where the sheer quantity of books poses serious security problems. One patron of the Los Angeles collection ran a successful second- hand business for forty years exclusively with books stolen from the library.

18. Libraries, Books and Politics > Page 407

the director of the Girolamini Library in Naples was convicted of presiding over the systematic plunder of his own collection, feeding up to 4,000 rare and precious books into the market through a range of crooked book dealers.

18. Libraries, Books and Politics > Page 409

Most of all, by empowering the digital revolution, librarians have given up the one unique selling point which they defended so tenaciously for almost as long as we have had libraries: the right to apply their knowledge, taste and discrimination to assisting the choice of their patrons. This has been the key to understanding so much in this book: the first booksellers’ catalogues, Gabriel Naudé’s manifesto, the ALA guide to a model library collection, the book club: the idea that in an age of plenty there will always be helpmates to assist readers in making the right choice of book.

Robert Peel: A biography by Douglas Hurd

Robert Peel: A biography by Douglas Hurd is an interesting biography. It’s interesting in that it’s written by a former Cabinet Minister – one who therefore has an appreciation for the day to day cut and thrust of politics that some academics may miss. It’s about a fascinating character – one who was willing to split his party on a principle, and made significant reforms. It’s almost too easy to imagine him as the leader that Malcolm Turnbull might have been, if he’d had more courage or luck. Hurd also captures – in his own way – some of their political thinking, the ‘what-ifs’ that might have animated the thinking of Peel and others, even though some aspects may never have come to pass.

Fascinatingly, 1834 also captures the point at which an English monarch dismisses a government on their own volition for the final time; and the point at which the Duke of Wellington turns down the role of Prime Minister, telling the King that the role should be based in the House of Commons.

This was an interesting read; a slightly niche topic, but worth it if you’re interested in Victorian-era politics.

Quotes

… the shadow of the French Revolution. That threat to lives, to the Church, to property, to the rule of law, to the whole familiar structure of society dominate Tory ideas and instincts. The fear lingered on long after Napoleon’s defeat at Waterloo. Napoleon had been a threat to Britain, like Philip II and Louis XIV before him and Hitler and Stalin after. Napoleon, like Stalin, had embodied not just a military danger but also the threat of revolution. True, these two rulers were heirs of revolution rather than revolutionaries themselves, but they had been brought to power on a surge of ideas which, once let loose in Britain, could lead to disaster.

We tend to believe in a self-satisfied way that reforms must inevitably have been pressing towards the state of affairs which we enjoy today, namely a reasonably liberal criminal justice system plus a professional police force. But the reformers of the 1820s did not instinctively think that way. They wanted to move towards greater freedom, in trade, in the currency, in speech, even in the organisation of trade unions. To them it was a backward step to create a police force, which they saw essentially as an instrument of government designed to watch the citizen and curb his freedom. A standing army was bad enough, and had to be reviewed every year by Act of Parliament.

[A fascinating story of Peel’s role in providing patronage for his old tutor from Oxford] … the climate of Dr Lloyd’s clerical career approach. He was now regius Professor of Divinity, but wanted desperately to be Bishop of Oxford. The present Bishop was dying but not dead. Lloyd sent Peel frequent bulletins … it seemed sensible for Lloyd to draft a letter which Peel, should the sad event occur, might send to the Prime Minister, Lord Liverpool, recommending Lloyd as the next bishop … Peel sent the letter to Lord Liverpool, and commented to Lloyd, ‘this is the only letter of an applicant nature which I ever addressed to him in my life – he will not misunderstand it’. In an age where politics and patronage went hand in hand, Peel’s abstinence from the pell-mell of job pushing is extraordinary … [after another figure seems likely to be appointed, and some back and forth between Lloyd and Peel] … Peel stayed calm … It turned out that the King was behind the manoeuvre. By promoting Dr Gray he wanted to free his stall at Durham, probably for some clerical friend of Lady Conyngham. The King’s whim evaporated. Peel worked behind the scenes for his respectable and well qualified friend. On 9 February Peel wrote to tell Lloyd that the Prime Minister had changed his mind and that Lloyd was to be bishop after all.

[In relation to the appointment of the Prime Ministership after an election] The King twisted and turned to avoid Canning. He played with several alternatives … The King suggested that the Cabinet should choose the Prime Minister, but Wellington, Peel and Canning all told him that this was a task for the King alone. The King could reasonably wonder about the nature of his authority when he was able neither to delegate this responsibility of choosing a Prime Minister nor exercise it in the way he wanted. The monarchy was entering a twilight zone, moving away from the age when the Prime Minister was, in fact as well as theory, the King’s Minister, towards the present position of, in effect, an elected Prime Minister. [Peel chose not to serve under Canning, despite the King’s request that he do so, because he felt he couldn’t advocate for a position on ‘the Catholic question’ which was at odds with his own leader and half the Parliament, whilst also serving as the Home Secretary].

The Conservative Party will always include Ultras within its ranks. These are men and women who instinctively resist change and pine for a golden age that never was. Every Conservative Association has always contained such individuals, some as its most energetic supporters. But the Ultras divide into two distinct types. There are those whose nostalgia is part of their charm. There is nothing ungenerous in their affection for the past; their backward looking is warm-hearted, even delightful … The second and smaller group of Ultras are the sour right. There is nothing warm or nostalgic about their politics. Most of them are intelligent and sincere; but their appeal is to the prejudices and cruelty which are part of human nature. The foreigner, the immigrant, the down and out, the Roman Catholic, the Jew, the Muslim – all of these have at different times become the focus of their sourness. The difficulty of the Ultras, whether charming or sour, is that they cannot win and know it … a Conservative leader has to coax them towards reality … An Ultra Tory government would be ‘supported by very warm friends no doubt, but the warm friends, being prosperous country gentlemen, fox-hunters etc. etc, most excellent men, who will attend one night, but will not leave their favourite pursuits to sit up till two or three o’clock fighting questions of detail on which, however, a government must have a majority’. This notion of squires more reliable on the hunting field than in the division lobby, more concerned with their dinner than with the clauses of a Bill, became a staple of Peel’s political correspondence.

Peel skillfully used the fear of crime as the main justification for his measure [introducing a national police force]. Public opinion, then as now, was sure that crimes against individuals were increasing and that the authorities were handling them with the utmost feebleness and incompetence. Affection for the ancient watchmen and traditional rights of parishes evaporated when tested against this concern. But there was another aspect of the creation of a large London police force. As we have seen, the main concern of the Home Office had traditionally been not individual crime, but public disorder. It was after all only eight years since London had been virtually in the hands of a mob stirred by sympathy for the absurd Queen Caroline; and that was just the last of a whole series of dangerous movements. Now there was to be a disciplined civilian force under direction of a senior Government Minister empowered to give orders to the Commissioners whom he had appointed. This was a huge increase in the physical power of government at the centre of the political system … In 1848, when thrones tottered across Europe and the Charterists marched on London, there were many reasons for the peaceful and orderly outcome in Britain; one was the existence of the Metropolitan Police.

The ambiguous phrases of politicians, sometimes described as weasel words, give the profession a lot of trouble. They are taken as signs of deviousness and a will to deceive – or at best proof of a feeble will. This is not necessarily true. A sincere and intelligent man may need time to make up his mind, or even more time to change it. While he is uncertain or moving from one opinion to another, he remains as silent as possible. But silence is not an option if he is daily in the public gaze, as Peel was in 1828. He constantly has to explain his views in private and public life. It is natural, and pardonable, that in these circumstances, he should look for words which form a bridge between his past and future positions. Such uncertain words are unlikely to impress his audience or historians; but they may well work better than an unqualified statement of a view he no longer holds or a premature announcement of a conclusion he has not yet reached.

The motives of politicians are neither more nor less straightforward than those of other human beings. We all operate on a compound of motives; the analysis is often impossible. Peel went through a double conversion, first to accept Catholic Emancipation, second to recognise that he would have to take it through the Commons himself. But mixed up in that genuine conversion was Peel’s belief in Peel. The very heat of the upcoming fire gave satisfaction. He was singled out for exceptional because he alone was capable of the necessary service to his country. Peel was preparing to taste for the first but not the last time the pleasure as well as the pain of martyrdom.

The qualification for voting [in Ireland] was raised to £10, namely to a level which would leave the vote with the kind of prosperous tenant or town dweller who had voted for Fitzgerald in County Clare while excluding most of those who had voted for O’Connell. Eighty thousand Catholic voters lost the vote in Ireland under the measure which enabled Catholics to sit in Parliament.

[After Peel gained a reputation as a rat for shifting his position on Catholic Emancipation, Croker writes in Croker Correspondence, Vol II, p. 15] ‘Some joker let loose a live rate in the House of Lords during one of their debates’.

Catholic Emancipation remains one of the great reforms of British history – because of its effect not just in Ireland but on the politics of the nation. For the first time a pressure group from outside Parliament had forced Parliament to alter the Constitution. The Catholic Association had achieved this not by violence but by the peaceful and shrewd use of a legal power, the right of the forty-shilling freeholder in Ireland to vote. The next example of such pressure would reach its successful climax four years later with the abolition of slavery in the colonies. That was a triumph over a powerful economic interest; Catholic Emancipation was an assault on the very institutions of the state. If such pressure could alter the sacred 1688 Constitution, could persuade Peel and defeat the Duke of Wellington, then other movements could gather strength for other purposes, and use that strength to besiege and convince Parliament. Within months the movement for parliamentary reform was under way.

The general election of 1826 had made matters worse. Local misdeeds were more notorious than ever. At Northampton the corporation’s candidate was shown to have been paid £1,000 out of the corporation funds. At Leicester the Tories in control of the corporation enrolled 800 new freemen with the right to vote, and paid one of their candidates £7,000 for election expenses. The town’s charitable funds were reserved almost exclusively for voters of sound views.

… the Duke of Newcastle who in October 1829 was reproached for evicting tenants who had voted against one of his candidates. The Duke retorted ‘[i]s it presumed then that I am not to do what I will with my own?’ This particular Duke was indirectly responsible for lighting the fuse which exposed one outstanding scandal of the system. The borough of East Retford in Nottinghamshire had through many elections continued a comfortable system by which the freemen were paid twenty guineas for each of their votes by the two borough Members. Forty guineas was a sizeable sum for the freemen. Both patrons, candidates and freemen, preferred this arrangement to the uncertainty of a contest, and the seat was peacefully divided between the nominees of the Whig Lord Fitzwilliam and a group based on the corporation. This agreement came adrift in 1826. The Duke of Newcastle, who had an interest which he had allowed to go to sleep, woke up and put forward a third candidate of his own. The fierce contest which followed exposed the corruption of East Retford so conclusively that almost everyone, including Peel, agreed that the borough should lose its franchise.

There was no Parliamentary corruption in nearby Birmingham because there was no seat to buy or sell. Birmingham was entirely unrepresented … It was Thomas Atwood who led the charge, the public-spirited Birmingham banker who was well known to the Peels, father and son, because of his opposition to a tight monetary policy and the return to gold … [Atwood wanted a more representative Parliament, in hopes that it would lead to looser monetary policy] … In December 1829 he founded in Birmingham ‘a general political union between the lower and middle classes’ to work for Parliamentary reform. After a slow start the political union’s membership reached 6,000. It was no longer disreputable for businessmen to join tradesmen in a pressure group to influence Parliament from the outside.

The immense popularity of the Bill in its different versions [which would become the Reform Act of 1832] became from that point the determining factor in its success. The great majority of those who at different stages mustered petitions, illuminated buildings, gathered crowds, shouted, threw stones and broke windows in support of the Bill would have no vote in the reformed Parliament. Some indeed in big constituencies like Westminster would lose the vote they now had, once Lord John’s standard threshold of £10 households was established. The Great Reform Bill would leave the propertied classes firmly in control of the political system. It only increased the electorate by about 45 per cent, from 3.2 to 4.7 per cent of the population. But the symbolism of the struggle was different. The middle and working classes were showing by different methods their rejection of the present way their country was run.

Britain was nearer to a violent outburst of popular feeling in these famous Days of May than at any time in the last three centuries. The middle and working classes were in general commotion. Meetings, processions and petitions were organised across the nations; factories and shops closed; there was a run on the banks; citizens declared they would withhold taxes; the King was hissed; men of the Scots Grey in Birmingham said they would not act against a constitutional protest.

… it is hard now to conceive how much effort and passion during the 1830s went into debating the established Protestant Church of Ireland. The number of Irish bishops, the collecting of Irish tithes, the allocation of Irish church revenues are questions so distant from us today that it is easy for us to turn the pages wearily until we reach a more congenial, comprehensible topic. Yet this was the subject which at that time preoccupied the King, his Ministers and the Tory Party – and which provided the pressures which held Peel and Wellington together. The fundamentals were clear. Out of eight million Irishmen, less than a million belonged to the established Church of Ireland, which was in structure and doctrine a weak sister of the Church of England. The Church of Ireland maintained 1,385 benefices across the country and twenty-two bishops and archbishops. But this imposing superstructure was not mainly paid for by the members of the Church. The tithe system meant that the Catholic peasant, often in addition to supporting his own priest, had to pay much of the income of the local Anglican parson.

These were high years for political dinners. For the two political parties they were an ideal means of building local support with the new middle-class electorate … Whatever the King might wish the split between parties was not temporary, but from now on a permanent and necessary part of the political system. Political dinners with their many speeches and toasts were a useful way of defining party differences. The local newspaper relished them, particularly in the autumn when Parliament was not sitting and political news was scarce … Parties measured their political progress by the size of their dinners … In some places the organisers linked the dinners with the new process of registering to vote.

On 18 May 1841 the Government was badly beaten on the sugar duties after a discussion lasting eight days … They pushed forward as if nothing had happened, and rain straight into a challenge of no confidence from Peel. The debate lasted from 27 May until 4 June, with an interruption for the Whitsun holidays. Peel renewed his attack. The result was unpredictable. Whigs who had voted against the Government on sugar would return to cast loyal votes against a motion of no confidence on the Government. The Whips on both sides exerted themselves with full force. The Whigs carried through the lobby Lord Hallyburton, the Member for Forfar, who was unconscious and said to be out of his mind. Every single Conservative either voted or was paired; for once the country gentlemen refuted what Peel had said about their dinners and lack of discipline. ‘When the tellers forced their way through the crowd on the floor of the House towards the Speaker’s chair, and the black hair and immense whiskers of Fremantle [Conservative Chief Whip] were seen to be on the right hand side, a great roar went up. The Conservatives shouted and stamped and clapped, and when the result announced – for the resolution 312, against 311 – they shouted and stamped again.’ One vote was enough. The Government was finished.

… Gladstone replied at length. He welcomed the principle of direct taxation, but found six objections to income tax. He would prefer to revive the tax on houses, which the Whigs had abolished in 1834. Peel responded courteously to his junior colleague with counter-arguments. He had a devious motive for circulating Gladstone’s paper to other Ministers, believing that a house tax would be so unpopular that income tax would seem attractive by comparison. Finally on 24 January the Cabinet approved a proposal for income tax pitched at a slightly higher threshold than Goulburn had suggested in July with exemption for those earning less than £150 a year.

[Gladstone, in examining proposals to change the Corn Laws] … was struck by the way in which Peel clung to as much of the familiar detail of the old arrangements as was compatible with his aims, thus reducing the points of disagreement to a minimum. ‘Until we were actually in the midst of the struggle’, he wrote on 26 February, ‘I did not appreciate the extraordinary sagacity of his parliamentary instinct in this particular.’

A Manchester free trade manufacturer called Barlow sent Peel two pieces of velveteen of the highest quality. He accepted with thanks, writing that his wife would convert one into a cloak, and he would use the other himself. He did not notice that the elegant design of the cloth of a stalk and ear of wheat had the word FREE on a scroll beneath it. The velveteen was a political manifesto. The press was told, the Manchester Guardian picked up the story, The Times followed, speculation grew. Punch enjoyed itself … There was no neat way out of this. Peel returned the velveteen, writing clumsily that he had not noticed its ‘allusion to matters that are the subject of public controversy’.

The Charterists had failed in May 1842 to persuade the Commons to receive a mammoth petition, six miles in length with (it was claimed) three million signatures. They had gained no sympathy even from the Radicals in the Commons … By contrast, the Anti Corn Law League was noise where it mattered politically, in the Commons and among the middle-class electorate. Ministers and the Conservative Party were enraged at the way in which Cobden and Bright stirred up the trouble for which members of their own League were party responsible. Such employers threw men out of work, introduced short time, and tried to cut wages … Yet the League appointed lecturers who went round the industrial areas exploiting grievances as if they were brought about solely by a selfish aristocracy who cared only for the Corn Laws … Peel and Graham decided against prosecution, but set about compiling a damaging dossier on the League’s agitation which eventually appeared, thanks to Croker, in the Quarterly Review in December 1842.

As usual Peel used Arbuthnot as a channel to the Ultras in the Commons and Croker to reach the readers of the influential Quarterly Review. These letters, carefully drafted and likely to pass from hand to hand, were for Peel the nearest approach to radio or television broadcasts today.

A pattern established itself [in Colonial expansion under Peel]. Local commanders, missionaries or entrepreneurs occupied fresh territory, usually on the pretext of defending what they already had. By the time the government at home received this news, the fact was accomplished. Those concerned had significant backing at Westminster or in the City of London. Provided that no great further expenditure was needed it was easier for Ministers to acquiesce, often with a grumble, than to try to reverse the fact.

[In response to O’Connell’s success of mass meetings for the repeal movement [to repeal the 1800 Act of Union], and a sense that the key points of agitation were clerics trained at Maynooth, Peel sought to bring the church closer] The main move towards the Catholic Church must come in the form of generous finance – private and public …

Of course he [Peel] wanted to have it both ways, to preserve his political position while achieving his objective. As it became clear that these two might be incompatible he had no hesitation about the choice. In his exalted mood it was much more important to repeal the Corn Laws than to save his premiership. By this choice he destroyed his own political position and sent his party into the wilderness; but he gained something which he had never consciously sought, namely popularity among the great mass of people as the man who brought them cheap bread. The real test came two years later. The Charterist movement under its leader, Fergus O’Connor, planned a gigantic demonstration on Monday 10 April 1848 in support of its political demands. A petition with five million signatures was to be presented at Westminster by a huge crowd which would first gather on Kennington Commons in south London … The Charterist plan was to install a National Assembly which would replace Parliament until the demands in the Charter became law. The Queen left London for Osborne. Even members of the Cabinet believed that by Monday evening Britain would be under a provisional government … Only 150,000 Charterists turned up on Kennington Common. They were outfaced by the police and abandoned the idea of a march on Westminister. The petition was trundled to Westminister in a cab. In the afternoon it began to rain, the crisis passed, and the Duke ordered the soldiers back to barracks. There was trouble later in London and northern cities and a large number of arrests; but the big danger was over.

The Patient Assassin by Anita Anand

The Patient Assassin is a fascinating book. It starts by unearthing a piece of history that I knew nothing about – the Jallianwala Bagh massacre, when occupying British troops fired, killing hundreds (if not thousands), and wounding more, in a crowd of protestors.

From there, it follows Udham Singh, who spent his life bent on revenge on one of the British authorities who authorised the attack. Udham Singh isn’t like John Wilkes Booth – his assassination didn’t change history. But his anger came from a resistance to occupation, to colonisation, and to injustice.

… [the] Hindu-German conspiracy of 1915, the ultimately doomed Berlin-backed attempt to trigger a mutiny within the ranks of the British Indian Army during the First World War. Khankhoje had slipped through British fingers with frustrating ease, travelling to Russia and consorting with the Bolsheviks at the very highest levels.

Whoever Udham contacted on his European adventure, he certainly seems to have miraculously arrived in England loaded with cash, enough to pay for rent at a number of locations and a motorbike.

Less than twenty-four hours after the shootings, every effort was being made to separate ‘Mohamed Singh Azad’s’ murderous act from the Jallianwala Bagh massacre. The Nazis had already made too much of the link and the British were determined to smother any potential uprising in India … characterising Sir Michael’s assassin as some lunatic lone wolf even before they knew who he really was. To admit the assassin was part of a bigger organisation or conspiracy made the defence of the realm look weak; far from ideal at a time of war and heightened security.

JD Vance’s Hillbilly Elegy

JD Vance’s Hillbilly Elegy arrived at a particular point in time – a year in which American politics was undergo a seismic shift. As the New Yorker review summarises:

Had “Hillbilly Elegy” been published last year, or the year before, it still would have found readers: it’s a detailed and moving account of American struggle. This year, though, the book has been adopted by an unusually large and passionate audience. The name Trump never appears in the book, which was written, presumably, before his capture of the Republican Party. Still, anti-Trump conservatives have responded to its largely empathetic portrait of poor, white Americans, which they see as an alternative to the less sympathetic theories about Trump’s least affluent supporters—“They’re all racist,” essentially—that have become popular on the left. Earlier this summer, Rod Dreher, the intellectually restless American Conservative columnist, wrote that “Hillbilly Elegy” “does for poor white people what Ta-Nehisi Coates’s book did for poor black people: give them voice and presence in the public square.” Liberal readers may bristle at the comparison—Vance, to be clear, is a white conservative—but Dreher has a point. Just as the death of Michael Brown, in Ferguson, persuaded many non-black people to read “Between the World and Me,” so the success of Donald Trump has persuaded many people who have never visited the wrecked towns of the Rust Belt to read “Hillbilly Elegy.”

In retrospect, as the world has watched the Trump administration with shock and horror, a lot of things take on a different perspective. So it’s interesting having read it a few years later. It’s a readable book – and to be fair, that’s no small achievement, when so many memoirs (political or otherwise) are slow, unwieldy streams of consciousness rather than mildly engaging narratives.

It’s also clear that the book has significant blind spots. It seems to identify clear problems, but then shy away (for reasons that are much clearer in retrospect) from clear solutions. Sadly, the passage of time hasn’t made things better – Vance is now a Republic Senator who repeats Trump election lies.

Quotes

They visited Mamaw’s brothers in Indianapolis and picknicked with their new friends. It was, Uncle Jimmy told me, a “typical middle-class” life.” Kind of boring, by some standards, but happy in a way you appreciate only when you understand the consequences of not being boring.

Drug addiction was a disease, and just as I wouldn’t judge a cancer patient for a tumor, so I shouldn’t judge a narcotics addict for her behavior. At thirteen, I found this patently absurd, and Mom and I often argued over whether her newfound wisdom was scientific truth or an excuse for people whose decisions destroyed a family. Oddly enough, it’s probably both: Research does reveal a genetic disposition to substance abuse, but those who believe their addiction is a disease show less of an inclination to resist it. Mom was telling herself the truth, but the truth was not setting her free.

Here is where the rhetoric of modern conservatives (and I say this as one of them) fails to meet the real challenges of their biggest constituents. Instead of encouraging engagement, conservatives increasingly foment the kind of detachment that has sapped the ambition of so many of my peers. I have watched some friends blossom into successful adults and others fall victim to the worst of Middletown’s temptations – premature parenthood, drugs, incarceration. What separates the successful from the unsuccessful are the expectations that they had for their own lives. Yet the message of the right is increasingly: It’s not your fault that you’re a loser; it’s the government’s fault.

The other driver’s sin was to insult my honor, and it was on that honor that nearly every element of my happiness depended as a child- it kept the school bully from messing with me, connected me to my mother when some man or his children insulted her (even if I agreed with the substance of the insult), and gave me something, however small, over which I exercised complete control.

Invention of Nature: The Adventures of Alexander von Humboldt, the Lost Hero of Science 

Andrea Wolf’s Invention of Nature is a wonderful book. The title is obviously a stretch, or a little grandiose – clearly it’s referring to the re-introduction of nature to nineteenth century Europe; and it’d help if Wolf had done a little more referring to other cultures and traditions that Humboldt encountered (or drew on?) in conceptualising nature as in interconnected whole. But it’s a great telling of a fascinating adventurer and explorer, who played a pivotal role in multiple fields, an intellectual omnivore, polymath and intrepid adventurer. One weakness to the story is that in making her point about Humboldt’s influence, Wolf delves quite deeply into the lives of other figures, to the point that there are entire chapters devoted to retelling Darwin and Haeckel’s stories. At times that can feel a little overdone, and take the focus away from Humboldt and his work.

But it’s a good book, and well worth reading if you want to learn more about a key Victorian-era naturalist (and presumably the person after whom Humboldt squid were named).

Quotes

Part I: Departure: Emerging Ideas

2. Imagination and Nature: Johann Wolfgang von Goethe and Humboldt > Page 28

The novel was published in most European languages and became so popular that countless men, including young Karl August, the Duke of Saxe- Weimar, had dressed in a Werther uniform consisting of a yellow waistcoat and breeches, blue tailcoat, brown boots and round felt hat. People talked of Werther fever and the Chinese even produced Werther porcelain aimed at the European market.

2. Imagination and Nature: Johann Wolfgang von Goethe and Humboldt > Page 38

two schools of thought vied for dominance: rationalism and empiricism. Rationalists tended to believe that all knowledge came from reason and rational thought, while the empiricists argued that one could ‘know’ the world only through experience. Empiricists insisted that there was nothing in the mind that had not come from the senses.

2. Imagination and Nature: Johann Wolfgang von Goethe and Humboldt > Page 41

Published in two separate parts as Faust I and Faust II in 1808 and 1832, Goethe wrote Faust in bursts of activity that often coincided with Humboldt’s visits.

3. In Search of a Destination > Page 53

All of Spain’s colonies were controlled by the Spanish crown and Council of the Indies in Madrid. It was a system of absolute rule where the viceroys and captains- general reported directly to Spain. The colonies were forbidden to trade with each other without explicit permission. Communication was also closely controlled. Licences had to be granted to print books and newspapers, while local printing presses and manufacturing businesses were prohibited, and only those born in Spain were allowed to own shops or mines in the colonies.

Part II: Arrival: Collecting Ideas

4. South America > Page 62

Before they set off, though, Humboldt dispatched letters to Europe and North America, asking his correspondents to publish them in newspapers. He understood the importance of publicity. From La Coruña in Spain, for example, Humboldt had written forty- three letters just before their departure. If he died during the voyage, he would at least not be forgotten.

5. The Llanos and the Orinoco > Page 69

Covered in dust and burned by the sun, the men were desperate for a bath. With the landowner absent, the foreman pointed them to a nearby pool. The water was murky but at least a little cooler than the air. Excitedly, Humboldt and Bonpland stripped off their dirty clothes, but just as they stepped into the pool, an alligator that had been lying motionless on the opposite bank decided to join them. Within seconds the two men had jumped out and grabbed their clothes, running for their lives.

5. The Llanos and the Orinoco > Page 73

Hundreds of large crocodiles basked on the river shore with their snouts open– many were fifteen feet long or more. Completely motionless, the crocodiles looked like tree trunks until they suddenly slid into the water. There were so many that there was hardly a moment when they didn’t see one. Their large, jagged tail scales reminded Humboldt of the dragons in his childhood books. Huge boa constrictors swam past their boat, but despite such dangers the men bathed every day in careful rotation, with one man washing while the others looked out for animals.

5. The Llanos and the Orinoco > Page 77

This was a web of life in a relentless and bloody battle, an idea that was very different from the prevailing view of nature as a well- oiled machine in which every animal and plant had a divinely allotted place.

7. Chimborazo > Page 101

As he stood that day on Chimborazo, Humboldt absorbed what lay in front of him while his mind reached back to all the plants, rock formations and measurements that he had seen and taken on the slopes of the Alps, the Pyrenees and in Tenerife. Everything that he had ever observed fell into place. Nature, Humboldt realized, was a web of life and a global force. He was, a colleague later said, the first to understand that everything was interwoven as with ‘a thousand threads’. This new idea of nature was to change the way people understood the world.

7. Chimborazo > Page 104

Humboldt also investigated the cinchona forests in Loja (in today’s Ecuador) and once again recognized how humankind devastated the environment. The bark of the cinchona tree contains quinine which was used to treat malaria, but once the bark was removed, the trees died. The Spanish had stripped huge swathes of wild forest. Older and thicker trees, Humboldt noted, had now become scarce.

7. Chimborazo > Page 105

As they sailed from Lima towards Guayaquil, Humboldt examined the cold current that hugs the western coast of South America from southern Chile to northern Peru. The current’s cold, nutrient- loaded water supports such abundance of marine life that it is the world’s most productive marine ecosystem. Years later, it would be called the Humboldt Current. And though Humboldt was flattered to have it named after him, he also protested. The fishing boys along the coast had known of the current for centuries, Humboldt said, all he had done was to have been the first to measure it and to discover that it was cold.

8. Politics and Nature: Thomas Jefferson and Humboldt > Page 120

slaves in all but name because of a labour system– the so- called repartimiento– that made them work for little or nothing for the Spanish. Forced to buy over- priced goods from the colonial administrators, the labourers were sucked into an escalating spiral of debt and dependency.

8. Politics and Nature: Thomas Jefferson and Humboldt > Page 123

For Humboldt colonialism and slavery were basically one and the same,

Part III: Return: Sorting Ideas

9. Europe > Page 137

The very idea of a colony, Humboldt argued, was an immoral concept and a colonial government was a ‘government of distrust’.

10. Berlin > Page 151

Schelling suggested that the concept of an ‘organism’ should be the foundation of how to understand nature. Instead of regarding nature as a mechanical system, it should be seen as a living organism. The difference was like that between a clock and an animal. Whereas a clock consisted of parts that could be dismantled and then assembled again, an animal couldn’t– nature was a unified whole, an organism in which the parts only worked in relation to each other.

14. Going in Circles: Maladie Centrifuge > Page 220

On 26 April a huge metal diving bell that weighed almost two tons was lowered by a crane from a ship. Boats filled with curious onlookers crowded the surface of the river as the diving bell with Brunel and Humboldt inside was dropped to a depth of thirty- six feet. Air was supplied through a leather hose that was inserted at the top of the bell, and two thick glass windows offered views into the murky river water. As they descended, Humboldt found the pressure in his ears almost unbearable but he got used to it after a few minutes. They wore thick coats and looked like ‘Eskimos’, Humboldt wrote to François Arago in Paris.

Part IV: Influence: Spreading Ideas

15. Return to Berlin > Page 226

Democracy, Metternich said, was ‘the volcano which must be extinguished’.

15. Return to Berlin > Page 231

Humboldt was revolutionizing the sciences. In September 1828 he invited hundreds of scientists from across Germany and Europe to attend a conference in Berlin.fn1 Unlike previous such meetings at which scientists had endlessly presented papers about their own work, Humboldt put together a very different programme. Rather than being talked at, he wanted the scientists to talk with each other. There were convivial meals and social outings such as concerts and excursions to the royal menagerie on the Pfaueninsel in Potsdam. Meetings were held among botanical, zoological and fossil collections as well as at the university and the botanical garden. Humboldt encouraged scientists to gather in small groups and across disciplines. He connected the visiting scientists on a more personal level, ensuring that they forged friendships that would foster close networks.

16. Russia > Page 248

In Miass, on 14 September, Humboldt celebrated his sixtieth birthday with the local apothecary, a man whom history would remember as Vladimir Lenin’s grandfather.

17. Evolution and Nature: Charles Darwin and Humboldt > Page 266

Humboldt informed Darwin’s understanding of nature as an ecological system. Like the destruction of a tropical forest, Darwin said, the eradication of kelp would cause the loss of uncountable species as well as probably wiping out the native population of Fuegians.

17. Evolution and Nature: Charles Darwin and Humboldt > Page 269

Darwin returned to a country that was still ruled by the same king, William IV, but two important Parliamentary Acts had been passed during his long absence. In June 1832, after immense political battles, the controversial Reform Bill had become law– a big first step towards democracy as it gave cities that had grown during the Industrial Revolution seats in the House of Commons for the first time and extended the vote from wealthy landowners to the upper middle classes.

17. Evolution and Nature: Charles Darwin and Humboldt > Page 269

The other exciting news was the passage of the Slavery Abolition Act in August 1834, while Darwin had been in Chile. Though the slave trade had already been banned in 1807, this new Act now prohibited slavery in most parts of the British Empire.

17. Evolution and Nature: Charles Darwin and Humboldt > Page 271

When the British ornithologist John Gould– who identified the birds after the Beagle’s return– declared that they were indeed different species, Darwin worked out that each island had its own endemic species. As the islands themselves were of relatively recent volcanic origin, there were only two possible explanations: either God had created these species specifically for the Galapagos, or in their geographical isolation they had all evolved from a common ancestor that had migrated to the islands.

17. Evolution and Nature: Charles Darwin and Humboldt > Page 272

In the first decade of the nineteenth century Lamarck had declared that, influenced by their environment, organisms might change along a progressive trajectory. In 1830, the year before Darwin set sail on the Beagle, the battle between the ideas of mutable species versus fixed species had turned into a vicious public row at the Académie des Sciences in Paris.fn5 Humboldt had attended the fierce discussions at the Académie during a visit to Paris from Berlin, whispering a running commentary of disparaging remarks about the fixed species arguments to the scientists sitting next to him.

17. Evolution and Nature: Charles Darwin and Humboldt > Page 275

The science of plant and animal geography, Humboldt wrote, was not about ‘the investigation of the origin of beings’. What exactly Darwin thought when he underlined this statement in his copy of Personal Narrative we don’t know, but it was clear that he had set out to do precisely that– he was going to find out about the origin of species.

18. Humboldt’s Cosmos > Page 292

Within weeks of the book’s publication in Germany and France, a pirated English language edition had begun to circulate– translated in such execrable prose that Humboldt worried it might ‘severely damage’ his reputation in Britain. His ‘poor Cosmos’ had been butchered and was unreadable in this version.

19. Poetry, Science and Nature: Henry David Thoreau and Humboldt > Page 302

Thoreau had developed a crush on Emerson’s wife, Lydian.

Part V: New Worlds: Evolving Ideas

20. The Greatest Man Since the Deluge > Page 315

The next day Humboldt ignored his obligations to the king and marched at the head of the funeral procession for the fallen revolutionaries.

20. The Greatest Man Since the Deluge > Page 320

As the mathematician Friedrich Gauß said, the zeal with which Humboldt helped and encouraged others was ‘one of the most wonderful jewels in Humboldt’s crown’. It also meant that Humboldt ruled over the destinies of scientists across the world. Becoming one of Humboldt’s protégés could make one’s career. It was even rumoured that he now controlled the outcome of elections at the Académie des Sciences in Paris, with candidates first auditioning at Humboldt’s Berlin apartment before they went to the Académie.

20. The Greatest Man Since the Deluge > Page 327

He was particularly furious when a pro- slavery southerner published an English edition of his Political Essay on the Island of Cuba, in 1856, in which all his criticism of slavery had been edited out. Outraged, Humboldt issued a press release that was published in newspapers across the United States, denouncing the edition and declaring that the deleted sections were the most important in the book.

20. The Greatest Man Since the Deluge > Page 329

At the same time Humboldt continued to be ‘unmercifully tormented’ by the volume of letters which had now reached almost 5,000 a year, but he refused any help. He disliked private secretaries, he announced, because dictated letters were too ‘formal and business- like’.

21. Man and Nature: George Perkins Marsh and Humboldt > Page 337

His dream posting would have been Humboldt’s hometown of Berlin, but Marsh’s hopes were dashed when a senator from Indiana, who also had his eyes set on Berlin, sent several cases of champagne to Washington with which to bribe the politicians who would decide on the candidate. Within hours the men were in such ‘a state of fearful intoxication’, Marsh heard from friends, that they were dancing and singing. By the end of the night the drunken politicians announced that the senator from Indiana would be going to Berlin.

21. Man and Nature: George Perkins Marsh and Humboldt > Page 342

The ground required to feed the animals, Marsh calculated, was much greater than the size of the fields needed for the equivalent nutritional value in grains and vegetables. Marsh concluded that a vegetarian’s diet was environmentally more responsible than that of a meat eater.

21. Man and Nature: George Perkins Marsh and Humboldt > Page 346

Man and Nature Marsh reeled off one example after another of how humans interfered with nature’s rhythms: when a Parisian milliner invented silk hats, for instance, fur hats became unfashionable– and that then had a knock- on effect on the decimated beaver populations in Canada which began to recover. Likewise farmers, who had killed birds in large numbers to protect their harvests, then had to battle with swarms of insects that had previously been the birds’ prey. During the Napoleonic Wars, Marsh wrote, wolves had reappeared in some parts of Europe because their usual hunters were occupied on the battlefields.

21. Man and Nature: George Perkins Marsh and Humboldt > Page 347

The Roman Empire had fallen, Marsh concluded, because the Romans had destroyed their forests and thereby the very soil that fed them.

21. Man and Nature: George Perkins Marsh and Humboldt > Page 350

Man and Nature was the first work of natural history fundamentally to influence American politics. It was, as the American writer and environmentalist Wallace Stegner later said, the ‘rudest kick in the face’ to America’s optimism.

21. Man and Nature: George Perkins Marsh and Humboldt > Page 350

Man and Nature’s full impact was not felt for several decades but the book influenced a great number of people in the United States who would become key figures in the preservation and conservation movements. John Muir, the ‘father of the National Parks’, would read it, as would Gifford Pinchot, the first chief of the United States Forestry Service, who would call it ‘epoch- making’.

21. Man and Nature: George Perkins Marsh and Humboldt > Page 350

Marsh’s observations on deforestation in Man and Nature led to the passage of the 1873 Timber Culture Act which encouraged settlers on the Great Plains to plant trees.

22. Art, Ecology and Nature: Ernst Haeckel and Humboldt > Page 356

Initially Haeckel did as he was asked, but quietly tried to sabotage their plans. When he set up his practice in Berlin, he introduced rather eccentric opening hours. Patients could only see him for consultations between five and six o’clock in the morning. Unsurprisingly, he had just half a dozen patients during his year as a doctor– although, as he proudly announced, none died in his care.

Epilogue

22. Art, Ecology and Nature: Ernst Haeckel and Humboldt > Page 397

Similarly in the United States, when Congress joined the conflict in 1917, German- Americans were suddenly lynched and harassed. In Cleveland, where fifty years earlier thousands had marched through the streets in celebration of Humboldt’s centennial, German books were burned in a huge public bonfire. In Cincinnati all German publications were removed from the shelves of the public library and ‘Humboldt Street’ was renamed ‘Taft Street’.

Beyond Measure: The hidden history of measurement by James Vincent

A history of measurement might not sound like an interesting premise for a book. It’s actually … kind of amazing. That’s in large part because the author, James Vincent, has done an excellent job with the book. In Beyond Measure, Vincent goes to the deeper questions, the reasons why measurement matters. He uses the conceptual framework to touch on how we understand the world, how people and governments exert systems of control on others around them, and how changing measurement systems can reflect internal or international conflict between countries. I loved it, and I’d say it’s well worth a read.

Quotes

Introduction: Why measurement matters

Page 8

The roots of measurement are entangled with those of civilisation, traceable back to the ancient Egyptians and Babylonians. It was these societies that first learned to apply consistent units in construction, trade, and astronomy, building towering monuments to gods and kings, and mapping the stars with their newfound power.

Page 9

Regardless of whether we think about it or not, measurement is suffused throughout the world; an ordering principle that affects not only what we see and touch, but also the often intangible guidelines of society, from clocks and calendars to the rewards and punishments of work.

Page 12

It’s not enough to simply compare one tower to another or use a measuring tool the same height as the target. We must instead create an intermediary: a unit of measure that represents nothing but its own value and provides a convenient medium for transferring information from one domain to another.

Page 14

metrological triumphalism: a confidence in the power of number to square the untidy mysteries of the universe and tame the unknown through calculation. It is a reasonable belief given the history of the sciences, where accurate measure has time and time again proved itself a prerequisite for experiment and a spur to discovery.

Page 17

Indeed, if you were to summarise the history of measurement in a single sentence, it would be as a history of increasing abstraction. Measurement begins life rooted in the particulars of human experience but over time has become increasingly detached from our life and labour. Just as with Kepler’s laws, the result is that it has attained authority over an ever- expanding domain.

Page 20

Corruption, too, flourished with variable measures. Manorial lords, for example, would collect their feudal dues using capacity measures of grain larger than those used in markets and mills. When their dependents were cheated, what authority could they turn to? An absence of standardised measures created a power vacuum that was easy to exploit.

Page 24

Measurement is unquestionably a tool of control and, as a result, has been used throughout history to manipulate, persecute, and oppress. To measure something, after all, is to impose limits on the world: to say this far but no further.

Page 24

Measurement is a tool that reinforces what we find important in life, what we think is worth paying attention to. The question, then, of who gets to make those choices is of the utmost importance.

1: The kindling of civilisation: The ancient world, the first units of measurement, and their cognitive rewards

Page 32

‘Even then people were reliant on the Nile, and one of the reasons we think the whole ancient Egyptian state came about, with the creation of writing and bureaucracy and so on, was to organise access to the water and land,’ she says. ‘You have to figure out a way of documenting who owns the water and who gets access to it, and that requires the state.’

Page 41

a product of the state’s bureaucratic culture known as the Onomasticon of Amenopĕ. In its simplest form, the onomasticon is simply a list of some 610 entries: items that collectively span the known world.

Page 46

For the ancient Greeks, these stars were the seven daughters of the Titan Atlas running from the hunter Orion while their father was occupied holding up the heavens. But they were also a signal to labourers: when the stars disappeared, it meant that the sailing season had ended and they must return to their fields. As the eighth- century bc poet Hesiod writes in his didactic poem Works and Days: ‘When the Pleiades, the Hyades, and mighty Orion set, / remember the time has come to plow again– / and may the earth nurse for you a full year’s supply.’

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The science writer Robert P. Crease suggests that there are three crucial properties that units of measurement must possess: accessibility, proportionality, and consistency.

Page 52

Poppy, millet, and wheat seeds have all been used to create measures of length and weight, some of which are still in use today. The barleycorn, for example, has a long history in Great Britain as a unit of length. It’s equal to a third of an inch, or around 0.8 centimetres, and has been associated with length at least since the early fourteenth century, when King Edward II declared that ‘three grains of barley, dry and round make an inch’. This definition later became standardised in the imperial system of measurement, and is still in use today as an increment in UK and US shoe sizes. The difference between sizes is equivalent to a third of an inch, which shoemakers call a barleycorn.

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we still measure precious gems like diamonds and emeralds with the carat, 37 a unit derived from the seed of the Middle Eastern carob tree (and that is now standardised as 200 milligrams).

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it was Ethiopian folk wisdom to ask a friend with ‘long arms’ to go to the market on your behalf, the better to extract favourable measures.

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Each year, during the inundation of the Nile, the floodwaters would destroy the boundaries of the river’s surrounding farmland, and it was the job of a specialist corps of surveyors, known as harpedonaptae, or ‘rope- stretchers’, to restore order to the land. Using knotted ropes pulled tight to avoid sagging, they would venture into the mud and redraw the boundaries of the fields, ensuring that the waters unleashed by the river could be put to productive use. Their work was one of coordination and communication: minimising disputes between farmers and ensuring that the productive land was not wasted.

2: Measure and the social order: The importance of metrology for early states and the fabric of society

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It’s often assumed that the state is needed to create this shared space, but historical evidence of the development of measurement suggests otherwise. Take, for example, the ancient use of mass standards: stones carved into regular shapes like spools, cubes, and ovals that were placed in balance pans to weigh goods. These can be found buried deep in the archaeological record, appearing from around 3000 bc onwards. This is centuries before the first descriptions of ‘royal’ standards appear, suggesting rulers co- opted as much as they created consistent standards of measure. Despite the lack of any central regulation, these ancient mass standards are incredibly consistent in their values. One analysis of more than 2,000 standards used across Mesopotamia, the Aegean, Anatolia, and Europe found that the weight of these stones differed very little between 3000 and 1000 bc. The total variation among the standards, which were recovered from locations thousands of kilometres distant, is between just 9 and 13 per cent. The conclusion is that Bronze Age merchants were capable of regulating units of measurement without the need for an overarching authority, with each individual meeting between traders serving as an opportunity to compare and adjust their weights.

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the regulation of units of measure has been embraced by various political systems over the millennia. And from the ancient world through to the early modern nation state, enforcing these reliable units has been both a privilege and a duty, as necessary in justifying a leader’s rule as the punishment of criminals or maintenance of roads.

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The link between measurement and music can be traced back to stories of the mythical Yellow Emperor, Huangdi, who was said to have created the first musical pitch pipes when he commanded his music master to cut bamboo stalks to specific lengths, matching the cries of male and female phoenixes. 10 These pitch pipes, known as lülü, defined the harmonic parameters of traditional Chinese music, and were used to tune the instruments of the imperial court. As a result, their exact value was not simply a matter of aesthetic importance but held ‘cosmic significance’, connecting the rule of the emperors to a semi- divine past. 11 Because the pitches of the lülü were determined by their length, the value of the units used to measure the pipes could become a battleground for political factions. This dynamic is seen most clearly in the life of Xun Xu, a senior court official in the third century ad. Xun Xu was tasked with reorganising the imperial state led by the newly inaugurated Jin dynasty, 12 which controlled the south- eastern portion of present- day China. He sought to legitimise the rule of his new master, Emperor Wu, through the oblique politics of the imperial court, and by enacting a number of reforms to strengthen the emperor’s authority. These included changing the basic unit of linear measure, the chi. To define the new unit, Xun Xu raided tombs from the ancient Zhou dynasty, a long- lasting lineage that introduced many of China’s enduring political and cultural traditions. He dug up old Zhou jade rulers and used these as a template for his new Jin measure, which in turn altered the pitch of the lülü. He argued that by doing so, Emperor Wu was restoring the wisdom of this earlier, hallowed age, and that Wu’s predecessors had been literally out of tune with the harmony of the ancients. The Jin reforms– both metrological and musicological– would restore this glorious past. For Xun Xu, though, this meddling with measures did not have a happy end, and when he debuted his newly tuned instruments at court, the reception was not wholly harmonious. When the band started playing, the respected scholar and musician Ruan Xian, who was part of a group aligned with the pre- Jin regime, complained that the resulting harmonies were too high in pitch. ‘A high pitch connotes grief,’ Ruan is said to have commented. ‘These are not the pitches of a flourishing state, but the pitches of a dying one. The music of a dying state is sad and full of longing, and its people are full of misery.’ 13 His musical augury proved reliable. Not many years later, Emperor Wu died and the Jin state was plunged into disorder as eight rival princes struggled for power. Finding harmony among so many competing standards would be too much even for Xun Xu’s cleverness.

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In general, these variable units stayed in use at least into the nineteenth century, and their appeal is easy to understand. They’re rich in information that modern measures just don’t capture, shrinking and expanding to suit the particularities of their environment, like the quality of the soil or evenness of the terrain. Understanding how much land could be ploughed in a day or how much seed was needed to sow the next harvest was essential knowledge in an agricultural economy, and the rise and fall of these measures follows the contours of economic and industrial development.

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Each moment of metrological imprecision offers the powerful and unscrupulous an opportunity for profit.

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The most common infraction seems to be nobles and merchants insisting on using their own set of capacity measures when taking payment, which presumably offered unfavourable portions compared to those used among the peasants. One of the most well- documented records of this sort of manipulation can be found in the Cahiers de doléances, an eighteenth- century survey of complaints and grievances collected in the run- up to the French Revolution.

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with sunset and sunrise changing throughout the year, this meant the hour had to move with the seasons, expanding in summer and contracting in winter. These so- called temporal hours were inherited by Europeans in the Middle Ages and meant that the length of the hour in London, for example, could vary from 38 to 82 minutes.

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This fact was not so much unnoticed in this period as much as it was an observation that would simply have made no sense. Thinking of the hour as a consistent measure was not a familiar concept for most people, while the minute and second didn’t exist as common units. (The division of the hour into 60 minutes and the minute into 60 seconds comes from the Babylonians, who used a base- 60, or sexagecimal, system of counting for their astronomy. The ancient Greeks later adopted this and divided circular astronomical maps into 360 divisions, which were later transposed on to clock faces.)

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This unusual coexistence of temporal hours and mechanical horology is memorialised by some of the most beautiful clocks in existence: circular timepieces with hour markers positioned on rails that move about their perimeter like tiny train carriages, sliding back and forth to adjust the length of each hour so that it matches the changes of the seasons.

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Psychostasia is thought to have made its way into Christianity via the Coptic sects of north- eastern Africa, who themselves likely inherited it from the Egyptians. The weighing of souls is never directly mentioned in the Bible, but Christian iconography has embraced the scales of judgement, usually assigning them to the archangel Michael, leader of God’s armies.

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In Italy, from the twelfth century onwards such public standards seem to have become popular again as the area grew in wealth. Lugli dubs these monuments pietre di paragone, or ‘touchstones’, as they were often carved into stone on the sides of important buildings and public infrastructure. This gives them a status similar to other important rights and duties in medieval communes, which were often recorded in the same way. The facade of the cathedral in Lucca, for example, tells traders to ‘commit no theft nor trick nor falsification within the courtyard’, 53 while the commune of Perugia announced a new form of taxation in 1234 by carving it into a slab of stone and affixing this to their cathedral’s belfry.

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The pietre di paragone got the same treatment, with units of length carved as stone incisions into the walls of churches and markets.

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Verifying the value of a standard this way is referred to by modern metrologists as ‘traceability’, and it underscores the notion that if units of measure are to be trusted, then there needs to be a way to trace them back to their source and ensure they have not been altered. While length standards were the most common example of pietre di paragone, other units also appeared carved in stone. A set of standards on Padua’s Palazzo della Ragione from 1277 include a standard- sized brick, roof tile, and loaf of bread.

3: The proper subject of measurement: How the scientific revolution expanded measure’s domain

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When Plato says that the ideal population for a state is 5,040 citizens, for example, he doesn’t justify this choice by calculations involving, say, food supplies or division of labour. Having 5,040 citizens is right and proper for a city because 5,040 is the product of 7 × 6 × 5 × 4 × 3 × 2 × 1 and therefore a mystically significant figure.

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They approached scholarship like indiscriminate magpies, compiling anything that caught their eye in disparate sources, and happy to treat rumour as reliable fact.

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A similar transformation took place in the world of medieval music, powered by another quantifying tool: musical notation. For most of the medieval era, music could only be passed on from singer to singer, with our favourite encyclopedist Isidore lamenting in the seventh century that ‘unless sounds are held by the memory of man, they perish, because they cannot be written down’.

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Pope John XXII, actually banned ars nova in the first papal bull to deal only with music, the 1324 Docta sanctorum patrum. Seven centuries later, the decree’s complaint is quite cogent. It says that an obsession with melodic and rhythmic innovation has obscured the devotional content of plainsong: ‘The voices move incessantly to and fro, intoxicating rather than soothing the ear, while the singers themselves try to convey the emotion of the music by their gestures.’ The bull even refers specifically to the tools of musical measurement as responsible for this unwanted change, explaining that ‘the measured dividing of the tempora [periods, the basic unit of duration in music]’ has allowed notes of ‘small value’ to proliferate, which choke and starve the ‘modest rise and temperate descents of plainsong’ like weeds in a well- ordered garden. 43 The skills of measurement, quantification, and division were proving too fertile.

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Perhaps most importantly, the mechanical clock propelled a new conception of time into the public consciousness, transforming it from a constant flow, embodied in steady emissions of water, sand, and mercury, to a quantified count; something divisible, discrete, and measurable.

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As with the monastery bells, public clocks organised citizens into a cohesive unit, turning what had previously been private lives into communal tides that rose, worked, and retired as one. The fluctuations of the sun might determine the labour of agricultural peasants, but the new class of urban workers had previously lacked such central oversight and authority. This vacuum was filled.

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The mechanical philosophers reasoned that if clockwork was able to capture the movement of the stars and bring elaborate automata to life, who was to say that the natural world didn’t operate under similar logic? Might not the universe itself be only a sort of monstrously complex clock, a machina mundi, or ‘world machine’, that animated matter through the operation of as yet undiscovered gears and levers? If this was the case, then Aristotle’s teleological explanations, in which rocks fell to Earth and smoke rose to the heavens because it was in their nature to do so, were crude and unsatisfying. If nature worked like a machine, then it must rely on observable cause and effect, not some inscrutable soul- like purpose. You didn’t need to grapple with the world of the forms to unravel its workings; you needed experimentation and observation.

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From 1609, Galileo’s work moved to a new plane itself. Using home- made telescopes he’d constructed solely by reading descriptions of the device, he began to examine the night sky. There he found many unexpected sights, including the moons of Jupiter, the first objects seen orbiting other planets, and the surface of the moon (which, despite the claims of ancient authority, was not perfectly smooth but ‘everywhere full of enormous swellings, deep chasms and sinuosities’ 54). Turning to the sun, he noted patterns of darkness moving from west to east across its face. Were these clouds? Other planets? Whatever they were, they showed the heavens weren’t immutable, as Aristotle had claimed. The world above changed day by day, just like the world below. The mistake had been trusting tradition and authority instead of the testimony of the senses. As Galileo wrote, following his discovery of what we now know to be sunspots: ‘So long as men were in fact obliged to call the Sun most pure and most lucid, no shadows or impurities whatever had been perceived in it; but now it shows itself to us as partly impure and spotty, why should we not call it spotted and not pure? For names and attributes must be accommodated to the essence of things, and not the essence to the names, since things come first and names afterwards.’

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This is a core dynamic in the history of measurement, in which greater abstraction allows our tools to encompass larger territories. Abstraction loosens ties to the local and particular, allowing freedom of movement. But it comes with a price. As we saw at the beginning of the chapter with Donne’s concern that this ‘new philosophy puts all in doubt’, there is a psychological cost associated with the breaks of the scientific revolution, one that is powered by abstraction and measurement. The sureties of faith and the consolations of the ancients were weakened. New knowledge about humanity’s literal and metaphysical place in the universe had to be assimilated.

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He was a rigorous and inventive experimentalist; someone who stared at the sun and poked blunt needles into his eye to investigate the nature of light. But he was also an ardent alchemist and numerologist who extended the logic of his theories far beyond what his experimental proofs could support (or so his critics maintained). And while his laws of gravitation and motion mechanised the universe, turning the music of the spheres into a cosmic game of billiards, he also stressed the importance of unseen forces in nature. He considered phenomena like magnetism and electricity beyond the scope of his philosophy, and placed immaterial principles at the heart of the Principia in the form of the gravitational constant, G, which somehow held the universe together. What exactly this force was Newton could neither quantify nor explain, but he knew it was necessary for his calculations to work.

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As the English economist and Newton scholar John Maynard Keynes put it: ‘Newton was not the first of the age of reason. He was the last of the magicians.’

4: The quantifying spirit: The disenchantment of the world and the history of hot and cold

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It was here, on cold and crisp autumn mornings like today, that the bodies of executed criminals would be cut open for the benefit of young medical students. In return for their posthumous contributions to science, the dead earned themselves the redemption of a Christian burial, while students, watching from vertiginous tiers of wooden benches, learned how to save the living.

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In his utopian fable New Atlantis, Bacon sketched out a blueprint for his ideal state: an island empire ruled by pious monarchs, whose power is sustained by what Bacon calls ‘Solomon’s House’, a state- run scientific organisation that is equal parts secret society and research university. The institute’s credo encapsulates the grand ambitions of these early empiricists: ‘The end of our Foundation is the knowledge of Causes, and secret motions of things, and the enlarging of the bounds of Human Empire, to the effecting of all things possible.’

Page 141

The creation of reliable thermometers, he says, perfectly demonstrates the difficulty of establishing scientific truths in unknown territory. In the case of temperature, the problems are simple to articulate but maddeningly difficult to answer. How do you test the reliability of a thermometer without already possessing a reliable thermometer as a benchmark?

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For the ancient Greek philosopher Heraclitus, fire was not merely a material phenomenon but the first principle of the universe. It was the source of all life and a constant roiling change that burned through the world, transforming matter. The order of things ‘no god nor man did create’, taught Heraclitus, only ‘ever- living fire’, which shapes life in the womb and burns dead wood to make space for new growth. ‘All things are an exchange for fire, and fire for all things, as goods for gold and gold for goods,’ he said.

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We don’t need to see a body on a dissecting table to know that heat is life and cold is death.

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These experiments show how quantification can transform a concept like temperature. With the help of these early thermoscopes, hot and cold are no longer qualities that inhere within objects, hidden and inscrutable, but information that can be extracted from its source. Transformed into abstract data, this information can be collected, shared, compared. And the new testimony of these instruments is so powerful that it can overrule even our senses.

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And writing at around the same time in 1620, Francis Bacon comments that the thermoscope’s sense of ‘heat and cold is so delicate and exquisite, that it far exceeds the human touch’. 16 The scientific instrument had begun to displace human experience as the arbiter of reality.

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Although the exact mechanisms of heat and cold were not fully understood in the early modern period, scientists knew that changing temperature had an effect on a range of phenomena, from subtle processes like the speed of chemical reactions to more obvious events like melting, evaporation, and condensation. This meant that being able to record and subsequently adjust temperature was essential for experimentation in a range of disciplines.

Page 149

In the same way that the consistency of millet seeds provided a baseline for creating ancient measures of weight and length, allowing anyone to recreate the same unit as long as they could find enough seeds, scientists needed fixed points to anchor their scales.

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One contributor who stands out is Daniel Gabriel Fahrenheit, an instrument- maker whose work brought him fame in the early eighteenth century, but whose early life was marked by tragedy.

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After four years in Amsterdam, he absconded from his apprenticeship and became a scientific fugitive, stealing money from his employers to fund his own research, while hopping around European cities to learn from the great scientists of the age. His guardians responded as any caring adults would: they had a warrant issued for his arrest and gave the authorities permission to deport him to the East Indies if captured.

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Although measurement is stereotyped as a stultifying activity that reduces the vibrancy of the world to mere numbers, work like de Luc’s shows the opposite can be just as true. The desire to measure something with accuracy forces people to seek new corners of the phenomenological world; to find nooks and crannies of physical experience that were previously lost in the melee. The closer we look, the more the world reveals itself.

Page 155

There was just too much variety in the temperatures at which boiling occurred. Instead, scientists turned to measuring the steam produced by the water, which proved to be a much more stable reference point. Whether the water below was sifflement or soubresaut, the steam above was consistent. This may seem like a failure, as if the scientists working on the problem had wasted time with a series of wrong answers before stumbling upon the ‘right’ solution. But it demonstrates an important concept within metrology and science, what Chang calls ‘epistemic iteration’. This is the process by which ‘successive stages of knowledge, each building on the preceding one, are created in order to enhance the achievement of certain epistemic goals’.

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Thomson was inspired in his work by a text named Réflexions sur la puissance motrice du feu (‘ Reflections on the Motive Power of Fire’), which was published many decades earlier in 1824 by French scientist and military engineer Nicolas Léonard Sadi Carnot. It was the only book Carnot ever published, and was ignored almost completely by his peers, but it contained enough original thinking for a lifetime’s work. ‘It was utterly without precedent and dense with implications,’ as one historian puts it. 35

Page 163

This claim, that measurement diminishes its subject, is one that appears frequently in discussions of metrology. It is part of a broader charge laid against the sciences and captured best in Max Weber’s concept of disenchantment: the displacement of the supernatural by the scientific and an accompanying loss of meaning. Think, for example, of how caloric– a substance of almost folkloric properties: weightless, frictionless, and invisible– is supplanted by the brute mechanics of the steam engine and the dynamic theory of heat. In this framework of knowledge, the mysteries of the universe are eliminated as chemistry replaces alchemy and enchantment is subdued by engineering. Or so the story goes.

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I don’t agree that our changing understanding of temperature has led to an impoverishment of meaning. Instead, just as the heat of the furnace turns coal into steam and the motion of turbines, the scientific refinements of thermometry have transformed the richness of their subject, revitalising old mythologies and offering new ways to understand the world. Consider, for example, how the instrumentation of thermometry has furnished our language with new explanatory ideas. In the eighteenth and nineteenth centuries, the thermometer and its cousin the barometer were eagerly adopted as metaphors, appearing in books, newspaper articles, and political speeches. The visual language of falling and rising liquid was intuitively understood, while the uncanny sensitivity of these devices to invisible phenomena suggested they might have other, mysterious powers of quantification.

5: The metric revolution: The radical politics of the metric system and its origin in the French Revolution

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the system should be decimal, with all units divisible by 10. This was, and is still today, a controversial demand, with opponents arguing that base- 12 and base- 16 systems (like those used by British imperial and US customary measures) are easier for calculation. They allowed users to divide units into halves, thirds, and quarters without resorting to decimal places, simplifying daily transactions.

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The expedition itself took seven years, during which Delambre and Méchain struggled not only with the demands of precision, but also with the fevered climate of the French Revolution. Their method of survey was triangulation, which uses geometry to calculate distance. Their approach was based on the Euclidean principle that if you know the three angles of a triangle and the length of one side, you can calculate the length of the other two.

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this unfamiliar activity meant they were often challenged by locals, who took them for spies, or worse, counter- revolutionaries.

6: A grid laid across the world: The surveying of land, the colonisation of the US, and the power of abstraction

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Land surveys can seem like mere bureaucratic conveniences, but they play an important role in the development of the modern state. In his influential 1998 book Seeing Like a State, the political scientist James C. Scott argues that over the last few centuries, states have deployed various ‘tools of legibility’ to better understand and control the activities of their citizens. These tools are varied in both form and application, but share certain traits: they standardise and simplify the world, reshaping the organic development of society into forms that are more easily aggregated by administrative centres. Censuses are used to discover the size and composition of a populace, for example, and land surveys and property records document where they live and what they own. These methods of standardisation can touch on the most personal matters, reaching into the habits and customs of everyday life to adjust them for the benefit of unseen bureaucrats. Minority and regional languages are discriminated against or suppressed in favour of official languages, ensuring their speakers’ assimilation into the dominant culture. And weights and measures of individual regions are replaced with standardised units that allow commerce to be similarly harmonised and surveilled.

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Take, for example, the introduction of surnames in Europe towards the end of the Middle Ages. Until at least the fourteenth century, writes Scott, the majority of Europeans did not have permanent patronymics, with individuals often adopting new names when starting a new job or moving to a new area. 3 This caused problems for the state when trying to track the activities of individuals, as illustrated by a court case from sixteenth- century England. Here, a Welshman is summoned to appear in court, but when asked for his name replies that he is ‘Thomas Ap [son of] William, Ap Thomas, Ap Richard, Ap Hoel, Ap Evan Vaughan’. It’s a perfectly normal name for the period, a genealogical title that is both intimate and informative, identifying not only the individual, but his ancestry. The information it contains makes sense to members of Thomas’s community, who likely knew his father and grandfather before him. But to outsiders it is cryptic. The judge is unhappy and scolds Thomas, telling him to ‘leave the old manner’ and adopt a single surname that suits the administrative needs of the state. Whereupon Thomas Ap William Ap Thomas (etc.) ‘called himself Moston, according to the name of his principal house, and left that name to his posteritie’. 4

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The courtroom christening of Thomas Moston underscores the driving purpose of tools of legibility: to iron out the particularities of local knowledge and repackage it into universal forms. Once you’re aware of this dynamic, you will find it everywhere in your life, when the bureaucracies of state and business slot you into categories built for their convenience.

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It’s interesting to contrast this method with older traditions of survey and ownership in the British Isles, such as the annual ritual of ‘beating the bounds’. During the beating of the bounds, residents of a town or village would gather together to carry out a foot survey of their community. Priests and elders would lead the expeditions, pointing out geographical features like streams, rocks, and walls that marked the limits of their parish.

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This flexibility made Gunter’s chain the dominant tool for land surveying in the English- speaking world for some 300 years. And although it has long been superseded by modern measuring tools, Gunter’s chain is still embedded in the landscapes of former British colonies, including the US, Canada, Australia, and New Zealand. Roads in these territories are often one chain wide, while building lots and city blocks are commonly measured in multiples of chains. In the UK itself, the length of the chain is encoded in one of the country’s cultural cornerstones: the cricket pitch. It’s proof that if you look hard enough at the divisions of the world that seem arbitrary or haphazard, you will find long- forgotten choices, produced by necessity and preserved by tradition.

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Jefferson was critical in setting the manner of this expansion, and helped form a trio of laws passed in 1784, 1785, and 1787 and collectively known as the Northwest Ordinances. Along with the Declaration of Independence and US Constitution, these are among the most important documents in the founding of the United States– not because they contain impassioned cries for democracy, but because they describe, simply and plainly, how its land would be divided, sold, and governed. The Northwest Ordinances authorised a survey in the form of a huge grid, initially covering the great mass of territory that lay between the founding states and the Mississippi River. The main subdivision of the grid was the ‘township’– a 6- mile by 6- mile square (the decimally minded Jefferson had argued for 10 by 10) that contained thirty- six subdivisions of a square mile each.

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As the French political scientist Émile Boutmy commented in 1891, when the surveyors had crossed the whole of the continent and the true scope of this land rush could be better appreciated: ‘The striking and peculiar characteristic of American society is that it is not so much a democracy as a huge commercial company for the discovery, cultivation, and capitalization of its enormous territory. The United States are primarily a commercial society, and only secondarily a nation.’

Page 231

The surveyor’s chain may not have been as directly responsible for the death and misery of indigenous people as the Winchester repeating rifle and smallpox virus were, but it was still an essential tool of colonial violence.

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Often, agreements between Native Americans and colonists were broken by settlers squatting the land illegally. Such activity could be officially disavowed by the government while serving its purposes. It created a foothold for further settlement and provoked Indian violence that could be met with military force. Surveying in this context gave the appearance of agreement between different groups, only for colonisers to later trespass the same boundaries.

Page 234

Contrary to Jefferson’s propaganda, his grid supported not just a prosperous yeoman citizenry, but also an enslaved and immiserated society: men, women, and children in chains, who mixed their blood and sweat with the soil, as Locke had envisioned, without expectation of ever claiming ownership.

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The template for survey- led conquest can probably be traced back to the British and the seventeenth- century war in Ireland led by Oliver Cromwell. Determined to quell a growing coalition of Royalists and Catholics, Cromwell pursued a campaign of pillage and slaughter in the country, leaving more than a fifth of the population dead and confiscating land from Irish nobles and clergy. To facilitate this process, a survey of the island was commissioned by William Petty, an army physician and former professor of anatomy at the University of Oxford. Petty recruited hundreds of soldiers to act as surveyors, teaching them to measure the terrain using Gunter’s chain. The resulting Down Survey (reportedly so called because ‘a chain was laid down’ 47) covered nearly 8,400,000 acres48 of territory and is a milestone in cartography: the most detailed, accurate, and extensive cadastral survey of the early modern era, and the first conducted at a national scale. For those who commissioned it, the survey was a huge success, facilitating the transfer of land and control of the nation. After it was completed, Catholic land ownership in Ireland fell from around 60 per cent to 14 per cent, 49 resulting in ‘the most epic and monumental transformation of Irish life, property and landscape that the island has ever known’. 50 It was a forceable change in the country’s ruling elite that wouldn’t be reversed for centuries, and, again, it was the power of the survey and measurement that was instrumental.

7: Measuring life and death: The invention of statistics and the birth of average

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this is one of the fundamental traps of measurement: the more precise you are, the more inconsistent your results often appear to be.

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His work triggered a statistical feeding frenzy among the professional classes, with societies, journals, and institutions devoted to the discipline springing up across Europe. Members collected and published data of increasingly dubious relevance, with one resourceful acolyte siphoning off the contents of the toilets in a busy train station to attempt to deduce the ‘average European urine’.

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The consistency of these findings revealed to Quetelet that individual choice mattered far less than we had ever thought. You might believe you’re getting married out of love, but statistics show you are simply following a line on a graph. As Quetelet put it in a private letter to a friend: ‘It is society that prepares the crime; the guilty person is only the instrument who executes it.’ 29 In comparison to his earlier work, these new conclusions triggered feelings of anger and disbelief.

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He even tested the limits of his quantitative methods by applying them to matters of faith, publishing a study in 1872 titled ‘Statistical Inquiries into the Efficacy of Prayer’, in which he hoped to determine whether ‘those who pray attain their objects more frequently than those who do not pray’. The evidence, he concluded, suggested otherwise. The most conclusive proof he offered was that despite an abundance of weekly prayers in churches for the health of the UK’s monarchs, they remained ‘literally the shortest lived of all who have the advantage of affluence’.

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But we still struggle with the dual nature of the figures it creates; with their part- invented, part- discovered character. Statistics about education, income, and IQ are used to make sweeping judgements about whole nations and races, while many still venerate the normal curve as some arbiter of social destiny.

8: The Battle of the Standards: Metric vs imperial and metrology’s culture war

Page 293

As with the pietre di paragone carved into the marketplaces of Italian towns, or the meticulous rules about measuring grain in medieval Europe, arguments about the price of bananas aren’t abstract or academic– their significance is weighed in front of your eyes. And the grievance had remained, even though the European Union relented on the issue. In 2007, in fact, the EU had told the UK it could keep using imperial measures wherever it liked. As Günter Verheugen, EU industry commissioner, said at the time: ‘I want to bring to an end a bitter, bitter battle that has lasted for decades and which in my view is completely pointless.’

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This pervasive nature of measurements helps to explain why changes to units so often occur in times of social upheaval, such as conquest or revolution. It is only during these moments, when old sureties are tossed into the air like dice to fall who knows how, that reordering anything as fundamental as measurement can take place.

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Taylor found that if you divide twice the length of the structure’s base by its height, you get a figure that is exactly pi– an irrational number and mathematical constant not formally discovered until centuries after the pyramid’s construction. Taylor suggested that the pyramid had been built using a ‘sacred cubit’ as a base measure, tracing this theory back to Isaac Newton himself, who had claimed the same unit was used in the construction of Noah’s Ark, Solomon’s Temple, and the Holy of Holies, where the Ark of the Covenant was kept.

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It’s an approach that’s similar to the Onomasticon of Amenopĕ, putting the furthest reaches of the world into simple order, and shows the intoxicating potential of measurement: its ability to make chaos coherent and to encompass vast spans of the world.

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Mostly, he says, people don’t bat an eyelid when ARM members are working. The high- vis vests see to that. Earlier on, in a different pub, he’d shown me a video demonstrating his point. It’s called ‘Uniform Obedience’ and features an actor wearing a nondescript but official- looking outfit, standing in a city centre and asking members of the public to perform increasingly bizarre tasks. ‘Would you just walk to the left of that apple please, sir?’ he asks one passer- by, indicating a core on the pavement. ‘That’s right, to the left. Now, could you also stamp on that paving stone please? Thank you so much. Just to test the weight, you see.’ Everyone in the video does what the man says (or at least, everyone the directors decided to show), and for Tony this illustrates something fundamental about human nature, about our unthinking obedience to arbitrary rules. I don’t ask if he sees himself as an exception to this, but assume he does. Instead, I tell him that Banksy also dresses up as a council worker to get away with his own public amendments, and Tony is tickled by the comparison. ‘Does he really now? That’s fascinating, just fascinating,’ he laughs.

9: For all times, for all people: How metric units transcended physical reality and conquered the world

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This discrepancy was discovered during one of its semi- regular weigh- ins– an event that takes place every forty years or so, where national standards from around the world are flown into Paris to be compared with Le Grand K and its honour guard: a set of six témoin, or ‘witness’, kilograms that were cast at the same time as the IPK and are stored in the vault alongside it. These weigh- ins resemble the treatment of grain measures in medieval Europe, with every movement scrutinised and every variable controlled. The end effect turns protocol into ritual. The sacral objects are the standards themselves, which have to be scrupulously cleaned before being weighed. Each one is rubbed down by hand with a chamois leather soaked in a mixture of ether and ethanol and steam washed with twice- distilled water. Given the high stakes of the measurement, absolutely nothing is left to chance, with the BIPM’s official cleaning manual describing every step in meticulous detail, from the amount of pressure to be applied with the chamois (around 10 kilopascals) to the distance between kilogram and steam- cleaner (5 millimetres). Even the method of removing excess water using filter paper is carefully described: ‘For this operation, an edge of the paper is put in contact with each drop and the water allowed to flow into the paper by capillary action.’ 3 It is a secular sacrament, designed to appease the gods of metrology and maintain the reputation of international measurement, a system that supports so much in the modern world.

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Looking back on the century in 1931, the physicist Floyd K. Richtmyer noted that what the printing press had done for the medieval mind, measurement did for nineteenth- century science.

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The danger of this situation was demonstrated with dramatic emphasis in 1834, when the UK’s seat of parliament, the Old Palace of Westminster, burned down and took with it the country’s standard yard and pound. Ironically, the fire itself was caused by the disposal of another ancient tool of reckoning: tallies. These are short lengths of wood carved with notches to represent money owed. These staves are then split down their length into two pieces, foil and stock, which are given to the debtor and creditor respectively. The unique shape of the wood’s split ensures this record cannot be forged (and is also where the term ‘stockholder’ originates). The British government had been using tally sticks in its accounting since the medieval era, but had finally decided to get rid of these old records. Two cartloads of tallies were burned in furnaces in the palace’s basement, but the fire spread and engulfed the building, taking with it the country’s standards of measurement.

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To Peirce, fallibilism meant that there are no facts in life that are beyond doubt. Everything we believe exists with the possibility that it will be proven wrong, from the base evidence of our senses to the most elaborate, rigorously tested, and apparently flawless scientific theories. The doctrine of fallibilism is distinguished from the approach of sceptics, who claim we can never know anything for sure, with the addendum that it is quite all right to believe that we know things (indeed, it is essential to living), but we must, at the same time, leave open the possibility that we are completely, spectacularly wrong.

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The speed of light defines the universe at its largest spans. It is reality’s speed limit: you cannot travel faster than the speed of light, and so you cannot transmit information beyond its reach. In other words: it cannot be exceeded. Planck’s constant, on the other hand, helps define the lower boundaries of reality by describing the smallest action possible for elementary particles. It cannot be subceeded. If the speed of light rules supreme among galaxies, black holes, and the spaces between stars, then Planck’s constant has for its domain atoms, electrons, and the pocketable abyss of the subatomic world.

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In Versailles, the vote in the auditorium is approved, as everyone expected, and the official definition of the kilogram is changed the following year. As the metrologists hoped, nobody who missed the news noticed. Theirs is an invisible discipline, their work hidden from the public view, tucked away at the end of a string of decimal places. Yet on these precarious digits hangs the world of modern measurement, and with it, the frontier of human understanding.

10: The managed life: Measurement’s place in modern society and in our understanding of ourselves

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The peanut butter belongs to a library of over 1,200 standard reference materials, or SRMs, created by NIST to meet the demands of industry and government. It is a bible of contemporary metrology, each listing testament to the importance of unseen measurement in our lives. Whenever something needs to be verified, certified, or calibrated– whether that is the emissions levels of a new diesel engine or the optical properties of glass destined for high- powered lasers– the SRM catalogue offers the standards against which checks can be made.

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Prior to the introduction of shipping containers, goods had to be packed on to ships by hand, an arduous process that required days of work by crews of longshoremen, adding to costs and slowing the movement of cargo. But being able to pack everything into one- size- fits- all boxes that could be hoisted off ships and on to trucks in minutes significantly lowered the price of moving material around the world, leading to an explosion in shipping. Today, shipping containers are the building blocks of the global economy, the standards that make it economically feasible to manufacture goods in one country, package them in a second, and sell them in a third. For better or worse, it is shipping containers that made fast fashion and the iPhone possible; that created the conditions that allow the world’s largest- ever corporations to exist.

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‘The problem is not measurement,’ writes Muller, ‘but excessive measurement and inappropriate measurement– not metrics, but metric fixation.’ 9 The roots of this ideology can be traced back to changes in capitalism beginning in the nineteenth century. This was a period when management in the US particularly was emerging as a profession in its own right, rather than a proficiency learned by industry natives. Between 1870 and 1990, the number of salaried managers in America increased 500 per cent, from 12,501 to 67,706, creating an entirely new type of business structure, which historian Alfred Chandler has identified as ‘managerial capitalism’. In contrast to ‘personal capitalism’, in which those making decisions about a business have a direct stake in its operations, such responsibility is instead outsourced to ‘teams, or hierarchies, of salaried managers who had little or no equity ownership in the enterprises they operated’.

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This compartmentalisation of labour led to the scientific management movement pioneered by efficiency- obsessed engineer Frederick Winslow Taylor, who advocated a set of working practices now known as Taylorism. Taylor and his followers analysed working practices through ‘time and motion studies’, which involved observing labourers and breaking down the flow of their work into constituent parts that could then be standardised. Like the row of butchers that inspired Ford’s aide, it was another act of disassembly. The aim, said Taylor, was to ‘develop a science to replace the old rule- of- thumb knowledge of the workmen’. 12 Importantly, this also necessitated a transfer of knowledge and power, from the labourers who carried out the work to the managers who oversaw it.

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The most benign thing that can be said about the Vietnam body count is that it was fabricated, with soldiers flinging AK- 47s on to farmers killed in their crossfire and marking them down as dead Viet Cong in order to meet the quotas set by their superiors. It is more accurate to say that it encouraged war crimes. American troops massacred civilians, children, and babies in the knowledge that they were unlikely to face punishment; they turned unimaginable human suffering into statistics because they understood that this was the nature of their war.

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In the case of Google’s and Facebook’s shareholders, making the world a better place primarily means selling adverts. Despite both companies’ wild and ambitious side projects, from virtual reality headsets to self- driving cars, their wealth is founded upon something much less utopian and glamorous: targeted advertising, which makes up between 80 and 90 per cent of both firms’ annual revenue.

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Walk 10,000 steps a day, we’re told, and health and happiness will be your reward. It’s presented with such authority and ubiquity that you’d be forgiven for thinking it was the result of scientific enquiry, the distilled wisdom of numerous tests and trials. But no. Its origins are instead to be found in a marketing campaign by a Japanese company called Yamasa Clock. In 1965, the company was promoting a then novel gadget, a digital pedometer, and needed a snappy name for their new product. They settled on manpo- kei, or ‘10,000- steps meter’, the first instance of this metric being used to promote health. But why was this number chosen? Because the kanji for 10,000– and hence the first character in the product’s Japanese name,万歩計– looks like a figure striding forward with confidence. 35 There was no science to justify 10,000 steps, it seems, just a visual pun.

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‘More and more, for the average late modern subject in the “developed” western world, everyday life revolves around and amounts to nothing more than tackling an ever- growing to- do list.’ 43 This mindset, says Rosa, is the result of three centuries of cultural, economic, and scientific development, but these trends have become ‘newly radicalised’ in recent years thanks to digitalisation and the ferocity of unbridled capitalist competition. 44 The history of measurement tracks much of these developments, for not only is it a tool that has been embraced to better understand and control reality, but it now mediates much of our experience of the world, and, crucially, our experience of ourselves. As we measure more and more, we encounter the limits of this practice and wrestle with its disquieting effects on our lives. As noted by Rosa, these problems have been described in many forms by many thinkers over the centuries. For Karl Marx, it takes the form of alienation in our working lives, as we are separated from the products of our labour; for Max Weber, it is understood as the disenchantment of the world, in which the rationalisation of nature removes its magic and its meaning; and for Hannah Arendt, it is the distance created by science and technology that replaces the closeness of human intersubjectivity, of a world previously experienced communally alongside fellow human beings.

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Goodhart’s law– ‘Any observed statistical regularity will tend to collapse once pressure is placed upon it for control purposes’– then turned into ‘When a measure becomes a target, it ceases to be a good measure’ in a paper published in 1997 by anthropologist Marilyn Strathern.

Epilogue: The measures in the head

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I think that many of us have this sort of relationship with measurement in our lives, particularly self- measurement. We erect scaffolds of to- do lists and deadlines that are equal parts obligation and aspiration, and construct within their frame the person we want to be. We’re encouraged to do so perpetually; tips and guidance on how to be more productive, to achieve more, permeate culture. They fill our magazine pages and social media feeds, promising that this or that new method will be the key to greater productivity and personal fulfilment. This isn’t a new phenomenon by any means, but it is ferocious in its current onslaught. Increasingly, our ability to manage our time productively is seen not just as an advantage but as a virtue– judgement on our moral worth. The ancient Egyptians may have been the first to suggest that you could weigh the value of a soul, but thousands of years later such reckoning is ubiquitous. History shows that the borders of measurement’s domain are not fixed. They’ve expanded as scientists have learned the rewards of observation and flexed to accommodate folklore and mysticism. And while it’s no longer common to attribute miracles to measurement, as with the mensura Christi and saints’ tales of the Middle Ages, there is still a residue of that same magical thinking in how we treat measures today. We have a tendency to venerate numbers for their supposed objectivity, to believe that all of life’s problems are soluble with statistics.

Random pieces – history and other things

This is just a note of a few more random, fascinating bits of historical trivia I came across.